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Not Prince Hamlet

"Full of high sentence, but a bit obtuse."

The Waiter Chronicles Survey: Are Those Real?

Friday, August 17, 2007

Every guest at the ristorante gets to see the dessert tray. It's a granite slab weighing about 15 pounds and dotted with silicon models of apple strudel, creme bruleee, and tiramisu, among other delectable delights.

The models were done by the owner's brother, and they're really good. So good, in fact, that often, instead of paying attention to me as I explain extol the culinary virtues of our Limoncello Parfait, guests fixate on the models themselves. Their heads cock to the side, their ears perk up, and their eyes turn into swirling spirals. Often, someone will just reach over and touch one of the models.

Inevitably, someone breaks the silicon spell and asks, "Are those real?"

I want your best reaction to that scenario, either the touching of the models or the question, "are those real?" (just to let you know a couple I've already seen tried: taking a model off the tray and throwing it onto the table; screaming, "No! Don't touch that!")

The answer that makes me laugh the loudest wins.

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posted by Not Prince Hamlet, 8:13 AM


"they're real and they're spectacular" ...stolen from Teri Hatcher on a classic Seinfeld, but it works here too
commented by Anonymous edub, 10:09 AM  
Are those real? "Why yes, yes they are. Silicon is the chemical element that has the symbol Si and atomic number 14. A tetravalent metalloid, silicon is less reactive than its chemical analog carbon. As the eighth most common element in the universe by mass, silicon occasionally occurs as the pure free element in nature, but is more widely distributed in dusts, planetoids and planets as various forms of silicon dioxide or silicate and deserts on restaraunt desert trays."
commented by Blogger Michael, 11:37 AM  
"Would you like to taste them and see?"

Then give a really big smile!
commented by Anonymous Anonymous, 7:45 PM  
"i get that all the time! then start bouncing up and down and comment how well they stand up to constant manipulation and ogling."
commented by Blogger KP, 7:53 PM  
When they touch it:

"Oops! Looks like that one's yours! What can I get the rest of you?"
commented by Anonymous Point of Order, 10:13 PM  
"Do you ask that about all your food? I thought I was the only one."
commented by Blogger stephanie, 10:26 AM  

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