Not Prince Hamlet

NPH Has Moved

2010-04-08T00:08:00.000-07:00

To www.notprincehamlet.com.

Click here to be directed . . .

The Scorn of The Conscientious Class

2010-04-06T23:58:00.000-07:00

I'm smiling politely at the Trader Joe's checker, who has just recounted to her colleague that they got a "bad batch of bags." I require the paper bags today because I forgot our reusable ones. Because I came almost straight from daycare. Because I've been out of town for a week and returned home to a bare fridge. And because I use the paper bags--to collect my recycling.

Yet these are perilously flawed. One good tug, one corner caught on a door handle, and my oatmeal would have been covered in egg.

Nice catch, checker. You do the Joe proud. I am happy to be shopping here with my two year-old daughter on a sunny Tuesday afternoon in April.

I am not happy with the smarmy-smug commentary coming from behind me:

"All the more reason people should bring their own."

Whuck?

The guy behind me in line has just answered my noble checker's act of collegiality with a kick to the human shin. I turn to look at my accuser. He's tall, young, and has a perfectly crafted hairdo resting atop his chiseled-jaw-and-high-cheekbone head. He is positively Grecian. He's beautiful. I hate him.

If I am to be fingered as an environmental menace at the local crunchy grocery chain, must it be by such a specimen of mainstream success? Could I not be accosted by the 75 year-0ld retiree with his cans of soup and cat food? Where, on this judgment day, is the patchouli-scented protester with her mattes of unwashed hair?

And he smiles. He grins at me (I hate you I hate you I hate you!) as if the two of us are sharing a condemnation of a third party, THAT guy, who we both know is going home to take a 57 minute shower with every light on in the house. But we're not.

I'm the guilty party here. Bad citizen. Bad dad. Bad hair.

I stop at 7-11 on the way home, just so I can buy a pack of cigarettes, smoke one in the car, and toss the butt out the window. If the scorn of the conscientious class is to be my diet, let me first work up an appetite.

I Was A Dumb Kid (4)

2010-02-15T11:15:00.000-08:00

When I was a teenager and in college, I went with my parents and a girl I sought to impress to a lake in New Mexico. The drive from Denver took us over Wolf Creek Pass.

At the top of the pass, I made the decision (from behind the wheel of the girl's dad's car, mind you) that coasting down in neutral would be a good way to save gas. So into neutral the car went, and I rode the brakes all the way down the pass's 10,000 feet.

The burning smell at the bottom was unmistakable.

I was a dumb kid.

I Was A Dumb Kid (3)

2010-02-13T16:43:00.001-08:00

Being home for a few days has reminded me of this:

When I was a teenager I drove my 1982 Datsun 200sx from downtown Denver home to the suburbs. It began to overheat very early into the drive, but I estimated the driving time to be short, and since it was January, it was cold outside, so that should have helped. Still on the interstate and miles from home, a loud knocking noise starting issuing from the engine as smoke billowed from under the hood. I took the next exit, and the car died before it reached the bottom.

I trudged through the snow to an office park about 100 yards off the exit and asked the people inside to call my parents to come pick me up. A mechanic who was a friend of the family had the car towed to his garage the next day and reported to my dad with a mix of amazement and amusement that the engine had literally been burned up. The sending unit had literally melted.

As the engine melted, all I could think was, "Just get me home. Just get me home."

Dumb. Kid.

For posterity's sake, below is the ad for that car, God Rest It's Soul.

I Was A Dumb Kid (2)

2010-02-10T21:50:00.001-08:00

When I was a teenager playing baseball in the park with my friends, a carload of older kids pulled up and started to bully us around. When the leader of the bullies demanded the aluminum bat I was holding, I . . . gave . . . it . . . to . . . him.

Seriously.

I Was A Dumb Kid

2010-02-03T21:04:00.001-08:00

Mark Oestreicher tells a story in a recent book about wrecking his dad's car on a traffic island in a completely vacated mall parking lot when he was 16. It got me thinking of the stupid stuff I did when I was a teenager.

For example, when I was a teenager I stood an extension ladder on end by itself in front of a window. Of course, it crashed through the window.

When I was a teenager I filled the power steering fluid reservoir of my new Ford Maverick with motor oil.

When I was a teenager I broke the frame of said Maverick by making a sharp left turn on snow and doing a perfect parallel slide into the opposite curb. Then I drove the car for two more days.

When I was a teenager I made an early exit from a McDonald's drive-thru by driving directly over the top of the traffic island. I wanted breakfast, and they had stopped serving breakfast. What was I supposed to do?

When I was a teenager I backed straight into a concrete-embedded light pole at 20 miles per hour in an empty parking lot.

When I was a teenager I at a whole plate of marinated onions on a dare.

When I was a teenager I stood on the hood of my friend's parents' car, putting two very noticeable dents in it.

When I was a teenager I tried to give my girlfriend a running piggy-back ride down the middle of the street. I stumbled and fell, and she had her face drug across four feet of asphalt.

That's only the tip of the iceberg.

Man, I was a dumb kid.

Corporations as Uber-Citizens

2010-01-22T09:20:00.001-08:00

Corporations as Uber-Citizens

Posted using ShareThis

Windell Middlebrooks Update

2010-01-11T18:41:00.000-08:00

Our guy has landed a recurring role on a major network sitcom. Check him out as Captain Duncook on the new incarnation of Scrubs on Hulu. Sterling College has never been more proud.

Tradition vs. . . . Tradition

2010-01-09T09:36:00.000-08:00

Mark Jordan has a helpful article over at Religious Dispatches about the "conservatives vs. liberals" or "tradition vs. innovation" narrative that drives most talk about church conflict, particularly conflict about sex-related issues. His core point is crucial. If heeded, it would change the way these debates happen. Here's the money quote:

What we are living through is not a fight between a pristine Christianity and the encroaching world, but a divide within Christianity over what exactly should count as tradition. It isn’t a fight between religious conservatives and activist revolutionaries. It is a deep disagreement inside Christianity over what conserving faithfulness means.

What conserving faithfulness means. What counts as tradition.

In common parlance, traditionalists advocate for a faithfulness that amounts to continuity and maintenance of "the way it's always been." Liberals conceive of a faithfulness that enacts values like justice and peace, drawn from a progressive activist culture.

Of course, "the way it's always been" is a matter of negotiation, as Jordan deftly explains. Furthermore, the values championed by liberals are religious in character and are pursued for faithfulness' sake.

The last time I took part in a church (Presbyterian) debate about the question of homosexuality, I noticed something new happening: most of the Bible quoting was being done by the progressives, those advocating a change in the "traditional" church understanding of sexuality. They were mining the tradition to suggest a faithful way forward. The conservatives, for their part, argued for church unity and the relevance of the church to contemporary culture, and in doing so relied heavily on sociological language.

The "religious" case was made by the liberals.

The pragmatic case was made by the conservatives.

Of course, the tradition won out, an occurrence that didn't need any debate to bring it about. I left feeling as discouraged as I've ever felt about the prospects for a meaningful discernment of the faithful thing to do. Jordan's insight makes me a little less discouraged, but only a little.

It's still an inter-religious fight over what constitutes faithfulness. And whereas progressives pay a thorough deference to the faithful intentions of their opponents, many conservatives are driven by the worst kinds of stereotypes about the intentions of liberals.

How would the character of the conversation change if traditionalists held a higher view of the faithfulness of progressives?

The Cream of the Crop on the Podsednik Signing

2010-01-08T13:14:00.000-08:00

They hate it, they hate it, they hate it.

"Any hope I once had that Dayton Moore knew what he was doing is gone." (David Pinto, Baseball Musings)

"If Dayton Moore were a writer he'd be Murray Chass" (Jeff Parker, Royall Speaking)

"This is yet another day in the past year that I wonder why I am a Royals fan." (Josh Duggan, Bleacher Report)

Inside Dayton's Head

2010-01-08T10:53:00.000-08:00

I like writing about the Kansas City Royals, especially their much maligned General Manager Dayton Moore. Even if you're not interested in baseball, there's something interesting happening in Kansas City.

For the last two seasons Moore has been denounced by baseball writers of a certain school for his roster moves: trading Leo Nunez for Mike Jacobs, trading Ramon Ramirez for Coco Crisp, trading Danny Cortes for Yuniesky Betencourt, signing Jason Kendall to a two-year contract, and on and on. And now those writers have another move to hate, the signing of veteran outfield Scott Podsednik.

The school these writers represent is the sabermetric school, which eschews the traditional measurements of a baseball players value (physical attributes like speed, arm strength, and power) in favor of a set of statistical measurements pioneered by Bill James. For these writers (many of whom work for the sabermetrics mother ship Baseball Prospectus), a player is worth what he has done, and what he has done can be accurately quantified by any number of staistical tools: does he get on base (On Base Percentage); does he hit for power (Slugging Percentage); does he give up many fly balls (Ground Ball/Fly Ball Ratio).

What drives sabermatricians batty about Dayton Moore's signings is that he shows a total disregard for their way of assessing a player's value. In fact, Moore has assembled the worst offensive roster in baseball as measured by the likes of Baseball Prospectus. Prior to 2009, this appeared to be paying off; the Royals increased their win total in three consecutive seasons. But the additions of Jacobs and Crisp in 2009 blew up in Moore's face, and the major league team took a major step backward.

Here's the dilemma, as I see it. Sabermetrics is quickly becoming the new conventional wisdom in baseball, and Dayton Moore continues to make moves with his major league roster that draw the condescension of sabermetric sages like Rob Neyer and Kevin Goldstein and Rany Jayzayerli, and even mainstream media columnist Joe Posnanski. So who's right?

Certainly the 2009 season put a huge feather in the collective Baseball Prospectus cap. But isn't a criteria for greatness independent thought? Would it not be disquieting for a major league executive to make personnel decisions to satisfy the theories of writers?

At the same time, is it not foolish to steadfastly persist in opinions that have been empirically demonstrated to be wrong?

It's the assessment of value that's a stake here. For the Dayton Moore's of the world, value is something you can see with your eyes and project into the future. Value is inferred, projected. It takes a certain kind of scout with an eye for the right attributes and "intangibles" (as an angry mob of sabermatricians shouts: "There are no intangibles!") to recognize value.

For sabermetricians, value is something you can mathematically measure by looking at past data sets. Value is measured. It can be analyzed by anyone with basic spreadsheet capabilities and rudimentary math.

I have strong sympathies with the latter view of value. At the same time, I'm rooting for Dayton Moore's moves to translate into success, if only to vindicate an open-ended, non-deterministic view of the world.

Removador Recordings and Solutions

2010-01-07T21:24:00.000-08:00

So, this guy called Yim Yames starts a record label to produce and promote undiscovered music. No news there.

Only "Yim Yames" is Jim James of My Morning Jacket, and the music is "Some of the coldest music you ain't never heard!"

This is Removador Recordings and Solutions, a roster of six acts that, with one exception, deliver on the label's promised obscurity. Well, one and a half. My Morning Jacket is, of course, on board, as is James himself, under the aforementioned Yim Yames moniker.

It's interesting stuff. For me, it's made all the more interesting by James' involvement in the Monsters of Folk collaboration last year, which was beautifully profiled by Under the Radar magazine.

Here's a guy who's an accomplished musician in his own right fighting the good fight for a collaborative ethos and promoting obscure talent, only because it's what he likes.

Cool. Cool.

Netflix: Me Likey

2010-01-07T12:56:00.001-08:00

Our family has used Netflix for five years now, with one brief interruption. At our most avid, we maintained a queue of four DVD's, two for me and two for mon amor. For over a year, however, we've been on the one DVD at a time plan, a plan that, since we don't have a t.v. or DVD player and therefore watch everything on our laptop, makes a lot of sense.

What makes even more sense is the option to watch Netflix content online, which we do as often as we can find something that doesn't suck. Just the other night we watched Doubt. The week before that The Princess Bride. Somewhere in the middle I spent a rib-tickling 90 minutes with SNL: The Best of Jimmy Fallon.

But the vast majority of online viewing content on Netflix is not worth the time it takes to watch. Perhaps that's about to change. From CNN:

In a groundbreaking deal for online movie rentals, Netflix and Warner Bros. Home Entertainment announced Wednesday that they have expanded their licensing arrangement for streaming movies, and Netflix now has licensing rights to more of the studio's catalog content.

I've long maintained that I would gladly pay subscription fees for online television content. Netflix is a model that works but that has been hampered by little quality in the content until now. If Warner Bros. can demonstrate that opening its catalog to Netflix subscribers makes money, then who knows what studios might come running to the table?

Of course, the catch is that Netflix has agreed to not offer Warner Bros. new releases on DVD (or Blu-ray) until 28 days after they go on sale. But I rent fewer-and-fewer DVD's and I consume more and more content "in the cloud" online, so I could care less about that.

Kudos, I say, to Netflix.

The Use of Doctrine

2010-01-06T20:41:00.000-08:00

A colleague in ministry expressed doubts today about the doctrine of the Trinity. His squabble with it is the way it's used, which he's found to be inevitably heretical. It is very difficult to speak of God as three-in-one, to teach and preach intelligently as God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit without lapsing into any number of "misstatements" of God's nature (insert obligatory nod to the provisional character of all of our God speech here; also insert here the qualification that the use of language is only one part of an equation that also includes its truthfulness or faithfulness).

Modalism is the heresy my colleague hears every time Trinity talk takes place. It is inevitable that people will talk about the different "jobs" assigned the unique members of the Godhead (the Spirit empowers; the Son saves; the Father creates; and so on), whereas one of the marks of Orthodox trinitarianism is the maxim that if one member of the Trinity does something, the other two, by participation, also do it.

For my colleague, this hangup is cause to rethink using Trinity language at all. He gets the doctrine. He can explain it to you all day long; he's just tired of having to. My on-the-fly reply was that just because something is difficult to explicate doesn't mean we should abandon it. Perhaps it means we should use it all the more.

I've thought about this throughout the afternoon and evening, now, and it's clear to me that I use lots of theological language not because it speaks to me personally, but because it's what I was taught. My teachers, though, were faithful men and women who had years behind their convictions and had been taught them by faithful teachers who had themselves been taught, and on and on down the line. I'm okay with that. I'm not sure if I should be, but I'm okay with affirming something I can't explain beyond, "That's the church's traditional teaching," or "That's our best understanding of it." I'm programmed to doubt that contemporary humanity could do it any better than the Patristics who hammered it all out so many centuries ago.

I'm not compelled to find different language because what we have is programmed for confusion. Is that a shirking of my ordination vow to "serve the people with . . .imagination . . . and . . . intelligence?"

Year-End Music Review: The Albums

2009-12-19T12:39:00.000-08:00

Road To My Love - Ana Egge

I started this quest for a musical genre with the album as the most basic unit of musical biology in mind. This post, the "album-of-the-year" post, is exactly what I had in mind last January.

Adult Nights - Wild Light

As the year took shape, though, and my musical discovery habits evolved, the album became less and less prominent. When you're looking for music all the time, starting from the assumption that you know nothing and seeking to discover new artists, then you don't spend very long on any one album. Instead, you obtain the album, stash it away, and move on to finding more.

Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix - Pho...

There were a few albums, though, that I came back to throughout the year. At pretty much any point, I could put one of these albums on and listen to it from beginning to end without feeling compelled to skip anything.

These Four Walls - We Were Pro...

Another way of putting it is to say that I would buy these albums and pay full price for them, and I would recommend anyone do likewise. And when these artists put out their next album(s), I will most likely buy them before hearing them.

Middle Cyclone - Neko Case

These albums paint a picture of a music listener drawn to the reliable conventions of pop music. That recognition disappoints me, even though these albums stand on their own and, in some cases, can't be confined to any one genre.

The Briar Patch - Freddy & Fra...

My albums-of-the-year list is what it is. I think this project, rather than creating new musical tastes and sensitivities, simply brought what was already there out into the light. And I'm fine with that.

Love At the End of the World -...

It's interesting to me to note that only three of these albums contain a song that made my "songs-of-the-year" list. In the case of "Middle Cyclone," "Love at The End of The World," "Road To My Love," "Time to Die," and "Adult Nights," the total package is greater than any one of its components. And that's an achievement in itself.

Time To Die - The Dodos

Listen to these albums. Add them to your collection. They're good.

Year-End Music Review: The Songs

2009-12-18T07:49:00.000-08:00

My quest for a genre nearly ran aground in the last quarter of the year. Family and work responsibilities mounted, and, frankly, I started to question the maturity of such an endeavor. I have satisfied myself on the latter point. Enough said.

Yet a certain fatigue set in as well, owing to the sheer volume of content that comes out every week (always on Tuesday). The online media landscape allows a neophyte like myself to sit in the presence of indie music's high priests, but nothing can replace time and experience as the arbiters of quality in music. My blunt tastes are being formed every day.

I plan a couple more year-end posts, lifting up the albums I liked the best and the blogs I used to find them. I'd also like to share some thoughts about the vehicles I have used to acquire music, since what I'm using today is not what I started with, and may not be what I use six months from now.

But without belaboring the point, here is a random collection of the songs I discovered in 2009 that I listened to the most, shared the most, and sit atop my playlists entering 2010. To qualify, a song on this list has to have been sought out for its own sake repeatedly during the year.

This is no countdown; more like a cloud. A cloud of musical goodness. What it says about me and my genre I can't say. Maybe you can.

Best Songs of '09

Cutting HIs Losses

2009-12-10T11:26:00.000-08:00

Last November I defended Royals' General Manager Dayton Moore in his acquisition of Mike Jacobs, a move roundly panned by baseball writers reputable and obscure alike. "Dayton Moore isn't stupid," I scolded. While I stand by that assertion today, I also am forced to acknowledge that those writers aren't stupid either. The Jacobs trade clearly stands out as the worst move Moore has made since taking over as GM in June of 2006. Anyone could have seen this as early as May of last season.

Including Dayton Moore.

So now the Royals have released him. Unconditionally.

Thankfully, his contract was only for one year, so it's off the books. But that's little consolation to Royals fans who watched a Leo Nunez-less bullpen give away 7th and 8th inning leads all summer while Nunez (Jacobs' trade opposite) racked up 27 saves for the Marlins.

I'll still defend the trade on the grounds that Moore was trying to inject some power into a woefully weak major league lineup, and Jacobs appeared, if not an unlikely contributor, a potential one. Moore's behavior this off season indicates that he's given up on the major league roster; he knows it's going to be awful in 2010, and he's willing to take his lumps in exchange for amateur players filed away in the minors (see the team's acquisition of 19 year-old Cuban defector Noel Arguelles).

Moore is entering his fourth full season as a major league GM. I'm comfortable with acknowledging that he's still learning the job. It's an impossible balance, with a small market team like the Royals, between cultivating a healthy long-term farm system that won't produce big league results for three-to-five years down the line and actually improving the big league roster. I think last year showed Moore that the worst of the best free agents available in any off-season are still worse that the best of the worst players in the farm system.

Rushkoff on Tiger

2009-12-03T07:53:00.000-08:00

In the latest Daily Beast:

in spite of our increasing familiarity and comfort with the Internet, most of us still have pitifully little idea of the fossil record of data we leave trailing behind us every day, all the time. Until, of course, it is too late.

Read the whole piece here.

Stop Building Fences

2009-08-13T10:36:00.001-07:00

Below is the copy of a letter I sent to Senators Feinstein and Boxer regarding their recent "aye" vote on the question of 700 miles of new reinforced fencing along the U.S./Mexico border.

Dear Senator Feinstein/Boxer,

You recently voted in the affirmative for an amendment to H.R. 2892 requiring the completion of at least 700 miles of reinforced fence along the southwest border before December 31, 2010. I am writing to express my disappointment at your vote and to urge you to reconsider your stance on the question of border fencing.

Having recently returned from a church youth group trip to Tucson, AZ and Nogales, Mexico, I have personally seen the blight that these walls are to the landscape. The Sierra Club Borderlands Campaign has thoroughly documented the damaging effect of border wall on animal species, vegetation, and community infrastructure. Lengths of border wall are ugly and damaging to the otherwise picturesque landscape of the American southwest.

Furthermore, these walls are ineffective. One Border Patrol spokesperson has referred to them as "Speed bumps in the desert." Professor Wayne Cornelius of the University of California San Diego studied the efficacy of border walls for over a decade and concluded: "the border enforcement build-up seems to have made no appreciable difference in terms of migrants’ ability to enter the United States clandestinely.”

I urge you to reconsider your support of new lengths of border fence. While supporting these new additions helps classify a legislator as "tough on security," the evidence shows that this is not a security issue; you won't find a single Border Patrol agent who has apprehended someone with terrorist intentions. The high price of these fences make their construction, while lucrative for contractors, devastating and irresponsible for the federal government, especially in a time of financial crisis, when health care providers, schools, and other essential social institutions are suffering from a lack of funds. Please reconsider how you vote on this issue, and vote "nay" on any new border fences.

Sincerely,

Not Prince Hamlet

Album of the Year Nominee: Eulogies, "Here Anonymous"

2009-08-12T15:34:00.000-07:00

This discovery came through KCRW. I heard "Day to Day" on the radio in my car and later found the cd in the great used record shop in town for $7. "Here Anonymous" is the first Album of the Year nominee to be procured via hard copy, ie on an actual disc and not an mp3 download.

Here's "Day to Day":

Album of the Year Nominee: Phoenix, "Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix"

2009-08-11T15:47:00.000-07:00

"Do let do let do let jugulate do let do let do."

Listen to "Listzomania," the first track on French band "Phoenix's" new record "Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix," and that little bit of jibberish will rattle around your head for days. And days.

This record has caught everyone's attention. To be honest, I can't recall where it first caught mine. My best guess is Lala.

And you will love it.

Album of the Year Nominee: Wild Light, "Adult Nights"

2009-08-10T12:18:00.001-07:00

The title is terrible, but the record, released much earlier this year, is terrific. It's indie-pop at its most buoyant. Track after track float atop catchy melodies and downright earnest vocals.

I discovered "Adult Nights" through a PopMatters review that hailed it as the absolute pinnacle of "indie pop." I knew after one listen that it would be there at the end of the year, and I've given it several months to disappoint me; it hasn't.

Warning: track one is a crazy obscene rant against the state in which I currently live.

Try "Heart Attack" on for size:

Heart Attack - Rob Dennler, Wi...

Album of the Year Nominee: We Were Promised Jetpacks, "These Four Walls"

2009-07-30T15:46:00.000-07:00

So good it hurts. Would the vocals be as good without the accent? Discuss.

Credit indierockcafe with this one.

These Four Walls - We Were Pro...

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc., Dispatch X: "Life on a Monopoly Board"

2009-07-27T16:26:00.000-07:00

There seems not to be a dispatch IX.

Life Inc. Dispatch 10: Life on a Monopoly Board from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

Album of the Year Nominee: Telekinesis, "Telekinesis!"

2009-07-27T15:17:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry to say I've forgotten where I found this record. It was back in March, and I immediately started recommending it to people. It's breezy pop performed by a band with a lead singer who doubles as the drummer. That's just cool. Seriously, it's a combination of fun and feeling that's rare to come by. Enjoy.

Telekinesis! - Telekinesis

Album of the Year Nominee: Freddy and Francine, "The Briar Patch"

2009-07-26T00:12:00.000-07:00

Hat tip to KCRW's Today's Top Tune Podcast for this discovery. I bought it on Lala over a month ago and listened to it several times that first week. Then it sat quietly in the queue until this past week when, while driving to Santa Barbara and to San Diego with international pals, we all discovered that it's great road trip music.

Here's a video of the first track from the album, "Brownstone Alley" as performed by some dancers in Brooklyn.

It's simply excellent vocal music. The songs are simple and solid, and they're sung wonderfully. Here's the entire album:

The Briar Patch - Freddy & Fra...

Rushkoff on Colbert Report

2009-07-16T16:09:00.000-07:00

Here's last night's Colbert Report interview with Douglas Rushkoff. His answer to Colbert's first question is such a sledgehammer that it draws applause from the audience. Bang!

The Colbert Report

Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Douglas Rushkoff

www.colbertnation.com

Colbert Report Full Episodes

Political Humor

Jeff Goldblum

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc., Dispatch VIII

2009-07-13T10:09:00.000-07:00

"The beauty and the horror of capitalism is that what it's here for is to make money by having money."

Life Inc. Dispatch 08: Capitalism, for Dummies from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc., Dispatch VII

2009-07-07T06:59:00.000-07:00

"We can engage with one another in ways that have been systematically removed from the equation. We will make less money in the process, but we will also spend less money in the process. And I promise you it's more fun."

Life Inc. Dispatch 07: Less is More from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

Album of the Year & Song of the Year, parsed

2009-07-02T21:45:00.001-07:00

Everybody does this, right? Ranks, classifies, lists. Especially when it comes to music, everybody has their favorites and rates them in relation to everything else.

I do too, but my musical favorites have a pattern of all falling into place in the last week of December and the first weeks of January. If you're not familiar, that means that they come together as a result of reading everybody else's year-end best-of lists, acquiring those titles, and then forming opinions on them. It is the definition of reactive.

This year I decided to try an experiment. This year, instead of sitting around and waiting for the New Year's holiday to find the year's best music, I would find it myself. That is, I would spend all of 2009 discovering, purchasing (more on that in a moment), and sharing music.

**The insistence upon purchasing music came from the crash of my hard drive near the end of December, which resulted in the loss of lots and lots of music files. No bother, though: I hadn't paid a penny for any of those files. They were either "shared" with me through a File Transfer Protocol set up for like-minded musical friends or they were acquired through The Pirate Bay. What ended up bothering me about losing all that music, ironically, is that it didn't bother me. I hadn't invested anything in those songs and albums, and they could easily be replaced. But why spend the time and effort replacing them if they're not worth any actual investment to begin with? It was the realization that I was a lazy music fan that brought me to Jesus, as it were, in terms of quitting the file sharing. I don't want to waste time on music that could either come or go; if I lose it, I want to be upset about it.

That's the point of these "Album of the Year" posts. Something has happened halfway through the experiment that I didn't expect, though. I'm starting to become more discerning in terms of genres and the types of music I like, take it or leave it. I'm coming to the place where I can acknowledge that I have suburban top 40-bred musical receptors that make me susceptible to pop hooks. I used to be embarrassed about that, like if only I could learn to like Wilco I'd be a better person. But Wilco bores me, and I'm not afraid to admit that anymore.

But I am discovering affinities for things I didn't like before and waning patience for things I used to love. The solo soulful male vocal backed by acoustic guitars and sparing percussion, which used to inspire hours of shower singing, has come to seem thin (my apologies to Jamie Cullen and Dave Matthews).

Meanwhile, I'm participating in the emerging infrastructure of recorded music production, marketing, and sales, all of which, thanks to the internet, is driven largely by an ethic of sharing. As I identify records worthy of superlative consideration, I'm noting where I found them, because that's really what makes the effort worth it.

Thanks for reading. Watch for nominees soon.

Album of the Year Nominee: The Lonely Forest, "We Sing the Body Electric"

2009-06-30T21:41:00.000-07:00

h/t to Indie Rock Cafe for this gem of a discovery, a complicated and exciting rock record. At this stage in my odyssey of musical exploration and investment, The Lonely Forest's "We Sing the Body Electric" is a shot in the arm.

Hear the whole record here, and see if the harmonies don't pull you under.

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc., Dispatch VI

2009-06-24T15:35:00.000-07:00

"If you want a really free market, then we should be able to have not just one government-mandated currency."

Life Inc. Dispatch 06: Why Corporations Hate the Free Market from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc., Dispatch V

2009-06-24T15:28:00.000-07:00

"Even the spiritual people among us talk about 'self actualization' as if that's the highest thing a person can attain."

"If people are cooperating and collaborating, it's not good for the economy. People who are sharing stuff buy less stuff. If people buy less stuff, that's bad for the GNP."

Life Inc. Dispatch 05: Markets Love Selfish People from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

Album of the Year Nominee: The Low Anthem, "Oh My God, Charlie Darwin"

2009-06-24T08:28:00.001-07:00

This is a new discovery for me, a Brown University-educated folk outfit that moves effortlessly between dulcet and demonstrative (take that, Ivy League!).

First, the dulcet:

To Ohio - The Low Anthem

And then the demonstrative:

Champion Angel - The Low Anthe...

Douglas Rushkoff on WNYC with Brian Lehrer

2009-06-15T14:27:00.000-07:00

This is apropo, because one of the founding anecdotes of Life, Inc. is Rushkoff's mugging in 2007. When he started getting pushback for talking about it from his neighbors concerned about their property values, he went on Lehrer's show.

Here's that interview, from January of 2007.

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc., Dispatch IV

2009-06-15T14:23:00.001-07:00

Life Inc. Dispatch 04: It's Just Little Brown People Over There, Somewhere from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

IdolCritics: Follow Up

2009-06-10T11:12:00.000-07:00

Iraheta has a record deal. With 19 Entertainment. Just like Kris Allen. And Adam Lambert. And David Archuleta. And Jordin Sparks.

Iraheta grew to be my favorite this season, and the pop music recording landscape will be better for her company. But my expectations are modest; it is, after all, 19.

Service as A Religious Product

2009-06-09T06:44:00.001-07:00

Mara Einstein points to an Ad Age piece (subscription required) about the marketing of religion (in which she is quoted) and suggests that, "Churches are starting to realize that they need to take ownership of those things that make them different."

She asks: "What can a church give people that the consumer culture can not?"

Her answer? Service.

Men and women in a consumer culture are looking for chances to serve and to learn how to serve well and (this is key) effectively.

Here's the thing: brands are beating religion to the punch on service.

Churches need to jump on this idea because brand companies have been co-opting this attribute at an increasing rate. Whether it’s Product (RED) (buy a t-shirt and you help people dying of AIDS in Africa) or Nike’s Human Race (run a race and money goes to one of three charities of your choice) or hundreds of other “buy-a-product-help-the-world” campaigns, branding companies are monopolizing social causes and religious institutions are going to find themselves left out in the cold.

Does it have to be so either/or? Can churches not look for ways to participate in these opportunities for service that brands are offering consumers, ways to direct people toward them?

At the same time, don't churches need to be able to critique the practices of the corporate entities that are offering service as a product? So Starbucks offers a Product (Red) coffee card and Nike sponsors runs for charity causes: that in itself is marketing. Those brands understand their consumers, and identifying with a social cause ingratiates the consumer to the brand. That's why the brand does it.

That's not why the church does it. Churches don't build Habitat houses and run soup kitchens to build loyalty to their brand. They do it because they're supposed to, because they are the guardians of a deeper truth, that life isn't really life if it's only lived for oneself. That's something the church can offer a consumer culture.

Turning service into a consumer commodity is a backwards way of addressing social problems that seeks to capitalize for good on the consumer habits of a people who know how to consume more than they know how to do anything else. But the tactic doesn't teach them to live differently. That's what churches can do.

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc. Dispatch III

2009-06-08T20:48:00.000-07:00

Life Inc. Dispatch 03: Money as Debt from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

Douglas Rushkoff Life, Inc. Dispatch II

2009-06-02T13:13:00.000-07:00

Life Inc. Dispatch 02: Insulation Equation from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

Douglas Rushkoff Life Inc. Dispatch I

2009-06-01T15:12:00.000-07:00

Get this book. Watch these dispatches. Be the change.

"The object of the game is not to create another big entitity that's going to take down those big entities, but to get off that landscape altogether and start engaging with one another in small ways."

Life Inc. Dispatch 01: Crisis as Opportunity from Douglas Rushkoff on Vimeo.

IdolCritics (The Offseason III)

2009-05-28T12:33:00.000-07:00

The LA Times Idol blog put the AT&T flap into some perspective:

According to a network spokeswoman, more than 100 million votes were received after the May 19 final performance between Allen and Lambert. Even if the AT&T workers passed out 1,000 phones -- the company said it was "a small number" of devices, without offering specifics -- and coached each user to text 100 votes, that would add up to only 100,000 votes, or less than one-tenth of 1% of the votes cast.

But a commenter asks a fair question:

Why does this article figure that one person could have texted a maximum of 100 votes on finale night?

Voting was open for four hours after the show.

Someone with a phone with free service, sending 10 texts at a time, could have send thousands of texts over those four hours.

Another commenter really gets into the math:

Sending out 10 at a time? You could do that in five minutes. I have an iPhone, which does not do blanket texts (that I've been able to figure out). It takes less than five seconds to send a text, times four hours, times 10. I'm no math whiz, but I have a calculator. At five seconds per text, that's 12 per minute, times 60 = 720 per hour, x 4 = 2,880 per four hours, x 10 = 28,800. Going at a moderate pace, one person could easily send 30,000 votes.

IdolCritics (The Offseason II)

2009-05-28T12:27:00.000-07:00

How this is helpful I don't know.

At the Peabody [Arkansas] watch party, Bobbie Kierna of Greenbrier voted 10,840 times on one of the phones provided by AT&T at a roped-off area with signs advertising it as a "Texting Zone." She said she stayed until 11:48 p.m. to vote for Allen, who was in school with her daughter at the University of Central Arkansas

IdolCritics (the Offseason)

2009-05-28T12:21:00.000-07:00

This was bound to happen. I think we all assumed the execs at Fox or 19 Entertainment would be outed, not one of the corporate sponsors. From the Times story:

Representatives of AT&T, whose mobile phone network is the only one that can be used to cast “American Idol” votes via text message, provided the free text-messaging services at two parties in Arkansas after the final performance episode of “American Idol” last week, according to the company and people at the events.

Oops.

2009-05-21T12:17:00.001-07:00

I'm happier for an Allen victory than I would have been for Lambert, but I've soured a bit on the Idol franchise after this go 'round. Has it jumped the shark?

A Reporter of Plaigirism Plaigirizes

2009-05-18T14:46:00.000-07:00

Maureen Dowd admits to plaigirism. Oh the irony. Somewhere Joe Biden is smiling.

2009-05-13T15:39:00.001-07:00

Kris Allen's "Heartless'' is the best thing to happen on Idol since David Cook rocked Mariah Carey. If he's not in the finale it won't be worth watching.

Life Inc. (The Movie)

2009-05-11T09:59:00.001-07:00

Douglas Rushkoff's latest book is preceded by a nine-minute film. Great stuff.

2009-05-10T18:58:00.001-07:00

Lambert got an Entertainment Weekly cover? Does he even need to win now?

2009-05-06T22:48:00.001-07:00

IdolCritics results: Iraheta's out and I'm done. It's been fun, kinda

Technology Is Not The Problem

2009-05-06T09:52:00.000-07:00

Steve Lopez of the LA Times checks in on the students of the California Academy for Liberal Studies Early College High School in downtown Los Angeles as they languish in the desert of a seven day teacher-enforced media fast. Deprived of their phones and iPods for a whole week and writing about it ("With pen and paper"), these high schoolers hear birds singing and devour actual books and reconnect in face-to-face interactions with family and friends. It's beautiful.

Except, I'm not buying it.

It's far too simple to assert, as this experiment and countless rants about "kids these days" do, that the media and technology are the problem, and that if you only remove that the kids will be alright. The Sidekicks and iPods connect kids to one anothter in ways that seem meaningless and shallow to adults but that to the kids themselves, I'm persuaded, are actually quite meaningful.

The technology ain't the enemy.

2009-05-05T22:56:00.001-07:00

Gokey should go. Top three: Iraheta, Allen, Lambert. I'd love to see Lambert get sent

2009-05-05T22:54:00.001-07:00

Cowell: "[Lambert] may have given this one (Iraheta) a chance of staying in this competition.'' You're not even trying to hide it anymore

2009-05-05T22:50:00.001-07:00

This Iraheta/Lambert duet totally shows her to be the more interesting performer

2009-05-05T22:48:00.001-07:00

Paula rallies the crowd for Gokey and Cowell declares he'll be safe. They're so bagging for a Gokey/Lambert finale

2009-05-05T22:45:00.001-07:00

The scream: what the he** just happened? That was horrendous!

2009-05-05T22:44:00.001-07:00

Gokey is weak. Gokey's a rocker like I'm a surfer.

2009-05-05T22:43:00.001-07:00

For Gokey, the scream is operative. That can't be good. The judges love him though

2009-05-05T22:41:00.001-07:00

Cowell's championing Lambert during Allen's critique is so unprofessional.

2009-05-05T22:40:00.001-07:00

Kara: you're a tool of the Producers. You're useless.

2009-05-05T22:38:00.001-07:00

Allen is better than Lambert. Take that.

2009-05-05T22:37:00.001-07:00

Allen rockin' the electric guitar is almost convincing

2009-05-05T22:35:00.001-07:00

Isn't it a disadvantage to have to sing a solo that counts after a duet that doesn't?

2009-05-05T22:32:00.001-07:00

The Gokey/Allen duet is really, really bad. What's the point of this?

2009-05-05T22:31:00.001-07:00

Gokey in glasses kind of ruins "rock week,'' doesn't it?

2009-05-05T22:30:00.001-07:00

Alison: fighting with the judges is always a bad idea. Not tonight, though: you go girl!

2009-05-05T22:28:00.001-07:00

A biopic on Janice Joplin? Do you not watch 30 Rock?

2009-05-05T22:26:00.001-07:00

Iraheta: the only Idol I recognize. She has depth and nuance that Lambert's screaming can't fathom

2009-05-05T22:22:00.001-07:00

Cowell: "nobody can top [Lambert].'' This thing is so fixed

2009-05-05T22:21:00.001-07:00

Kara: calling Lambert a "Rock God'' makes you look stupid stupid stupid

2009-05-05T22:19:00.001-07:00

Nope: right down the middle and solid as a Fender

2009-05-05T22:17:00.001-07:00

I'm afraid Lambert's gonna overdo it

2009-05-05T22:16:00.001-07:00

Slash on American Idol: is nothing sacred?

2009-05-05T22:14:00.001-07:00

Duets are a bad idea

2009-05-05T22:12:00.001-07:00

IdolCritics (top 4) mobile blogging: is the collapsed tower a ratings grab?

IdolCritics, Top 5

2009-04-28T20:18:00.000-07:00

From NPH: Kris Allen says he can't match up vocally with anyone else left. He's right, although his performance of "The Way You Look Tonight" challenges the assertion. He looks goofy in a suit, though, for real. Randy loves it ("Mad nice vocals"). Kara loves it. Paula loves Kris. Simon's not as enthusiastic, since it was "a little bit wet." Beautiful. Seriously, this is what Allen needs to ride as far as he can: guitar-less ballads that left him plant his feet at a mic and make goofy faces.

Iraheta, who is as hampered more than the others by this genre, is my favorite to make it to the final. She comes out all Michelle Pfeiffer in "The Fabulous Baker Boys" and absolutely crushes "Someone To Watch Over Me." She's it, boys. She's totally it. Kara places her in the finals based on this performance, saying, "If that doesn't land you in the finals, I don't know what will." Welcome to the party Kara. Simon predicts she could be in trouble based on her lack of demonstrated confidence. I hate the comment, 'cause Simon's crazy-like-a-fox smart.

Giraud went to Western Michigan University. So did The Roller's and my classmate. Huh. Dude needs to lose the hat, and his rendition of "My Funny Valentine" is bland, compared to what Iraheta just did. I wasn't moved. Neither were Randy or Kara. Paula liked that he took Jamie Foxx's advice (thanks Paula), and Simon throws his lot in with the crowd, who love him. He praises him for his "believability" and "authenticity."

Sidebar: can we be done with this insistence upon "authenticity?" What ever happened to the virtues of performers performing? When did it become necessary for a singer to be a lovable, believable, cuddly persona? I blame Kara for most of this verbiage, which I think has confused the contestants and single-handedly let to the demise of Lil Rounds. It's not constructive. It's not specific. It's sentimental and lame and all wet.

Next we see Taylor Hicks--er, Danny Gokey. He's boring. So far, the worst. He hits soaring full-voiced high notes and I couldn't care less. I'm ready for the Gokey parade to be over. Randy loves it though and thinks Gokey could make a record like this right now. Kara gushes over his "swaggah," Paula calls it "stellar," and Simon holds him up as the exemplar of confidence. Gokey looks on with his smarmy smile all the while. I'm not buyin' it.

And now the conspiracy has to advance, 'cause Lambert's in the sweet spot again, singing right at the end. That's the choice slot, and he's had it several times already. I expect nothing but salivating, gushing, coronating love from the judges. Jamie Foxx love him, for what that's worth. And, um, the high note he hits at the end is an absolute show-stopper. Kara and Paula are stupid beside themselves and can't complete a sentence in praise of the Wicked kid. I don't know, though; it feels like I've seen it already.

Concluding thought: I'm more committed to Iraheta and less excited about Lambert now than ever. I just can't bring myself to root for Adam; he belongs in a different format, not begging for the praise of this half-baked panel. Iraheta I can root for. And so I will.

Iraheta for Idol '09: the campaign has begun.

IdolCritics, Top 7 (redux)

2009-04-22T09:59:00.001-07:00

From NPH: Leaving the unpleasantness of last week behind, we press on to second week of seven. Three things have I noted, which I will briefly expound.

First, the video intros are gone. Last week's attempt at getting the show done on time split the judging in half, so that each performer was critiqued by only two judges. That was stupid. Everyone knows that if you haven't got Cowell's reaction, you might as well not even perform. Cutting him out of half the contestants was a bad move.

So this week order is restored and all four judges get a crack at all seven contestants (and, speaking of "all four judges," I'm ready to say that the added judge experiment is an unqualified failure. Diaguardi isn't terrible, just redundant; much of what she says is a parrot of what the other judges have already said. The show simply seems too big for her. If the tabloids are to be believed that either Kara or Paula will be gone next season, then I don't think there's any question that Kara has to go; Paula may be loopy and unintelligible, but that's part of the show's appeal.).

Secondly, Lambert is ruining Idol. I think it seriously has to be asked whether or not a contestant can be too good for the show. I've already aired my suspicions about the heir apparent's devoted fan following--the judges--and last night's love-in after his very, very good version of "If I Can't Have You" only confirmed those suspicions. He is an exceptional singer and a polished, poised performer, but Idol isn't doing itself any favors when its judges slobber all over him. Honestly, the shots of misty-eyed Paula during Lambert's performance and Randy's declaration that he's "Ready right now!" gave me an eerie feeling that the reality TV heavyweight was jumping the shark. It's bad television: it squelches the sense of competition, and it diminishes the judges.

Finally, Lil Rounds is getting railroaded. For weeks now the judges have ridden her with complaints that they don't know who she is as an artist. They have gone on and on about the Memphis diva's failure to "be herself," while at the same time blasting her lack of creativity and originality. Last night even elicited a prediction from Cowell that she's done for. It's not without any warrant, this line of critique, but they've hammered it so hard for so long, and they seem incapable of saying anything good about Rounds' performances beyond "You look hot!" that it's starting to appear scripted. Her take last night on "I'm Every Woman" won't change the course of history, no, but it was a solid rehearsal of a disco classic. You get what you get when you come on Idol, and blistering criticism from the show's judges comes with the territory; but if there's demerits to be handed out for a lack of originality, then give them to Randy, Paula, Kara, and Simon--give them to Simon Fuller--for Idol's inability to say anything coherent about it's only R&B contestant.

I'll end with a version of power rankings from last night.

Adam Lambert
Alison Iraheta
Danny Gokey
Matt Giraud
Kris Allen
Lil Rounds
Anoop Desai

IdolCritics, Top 7 Results

2009-04-18T17:48:00.001-07:00

From The Producer: So I created a "results post" so you the reader do not have to scroll down through the endless ramblings of NPH's most boring and unoriginal friend "The Roller" who so eloquently told you I should enjoy my life as an ass last week for stating the truth in an original manner. Well Mr. Roller while I will take "not totally devoid of insight" as your pathetic attempt at acknowledging I know what the hell I'm talking about let me restate something: Please stop writing because you're just awful, boring, and unoriginal. For instance I loved how you tired to be edgy this week by talking about Giraud's head mole ... whoa ... so edgy. You're a hack and if you are going to keep writing could you please edit your post so when you say "bottom 3 and then list 4 contestants" realize you just look lame.

What a joke American Idol was this week. Giraud should be gone. He's a good karaoke singer and that's the extent of his talent. I'm sure he could move to Detroit and play piano at some upscale hotel bar for money. Get rid of Lil, Giraud, Anoop, and Kris so we can settle out who is the next American Idol.

NPH - The judges huddle up because they are on a ticking clock with a live television show. That is why they huddle up right at the end ... unless you're crazy and quack like a bird across the stage. Then you can just sing your swan song.

I want to comment on your post from a few days ago as I'm so glad you gave Susan Boyle some love on your blog. Susan is everything that is good with entertainment. While you can make an argument that pop culture loves Susan Boyle because YouTube has now posted that at least one video of her performance has been viewed over 27 million times. I'm not convinced America really does embrace this type of talent because as of right now with the dumbing down of everything to appease the masses of closed American minds we wrap everything up into nice, neat, sexy little packages so Target, Walmart, and Best Buy can entice you to buy a really sexy packaged piece of crap. What I hope will happen is that talent will again rise to the top in all areas of life. People like Susan Boyle should be cherished because God has given her the gift, talent, and joy to sing in front of people. It's the same feeling I get when I watch or listen to Paul Potts, Howard Stern, The Soup, Slumdog Millionaire, The Sopranos, and even Eastbound and Down. It's the same feeling I felt when Barak Obama was elected President of the United States of America. I pray for talent to rise to the top and become leaders because of true talent and not because someone is a "total package" based on smoke and mirrors. The point of reality television really should boil down to this:

Give common people who have common jobs an outlet and opportunity to show the world that God has in fact blessed them with a unique, beautiful, and stunning gift. Perhaps America could learn a thing or two from British Reality Television ... perhaps we too can embrace true talent in all walks of life and holding on to those ideals might just allow greatness to rise back to the top and lead America out of this cesspool filled with mediocre people mistaking a sense of entitlement for talent.

America ... let's find our talent.

FROM THE ROLLER: Wow. You, sir, are an idiot. I find it incredible that you spend your first paragraph telling me what an idiot I am... and then the rest of your article proving the same of yourself.

First off... I don't think that I have an editing problem. Perhaps you have trouble reading? I said the bottom three is "between" the four contestants I listed. That means, in case you were wondering, that I thought it would be three of the four. Which it was, I believe.

Secondly, and most importantly, I appreciated your commentary on Susan Boyle and how her ascendancy to pop culture legend highlights the potential of reality television. Your effusive praise for NPH was well-taken. By me. Because... wait for it... I WROTE THE POST. Read it. Are prepositional phrases too much for you? Make a decision, Producer. Are you "so glad" about the Susan Boyle "love" on the blog, or is nothing I say/post worthwhile? While you're deciding, I'll tell you what is becoming increasingly obvious: America need not look for its talent anywhere in your vicinity.

I'm done.

Idol Critics, Top 7

2009-04-14T21:29:00.000-07:00

From the Roller:
Sort of live-blogging (DVR style)
my initial impression of Allison's performance was that “if the judges praise the heck out of her, it’s a total scam.” This was not a good vocal. Listen to it. I beg of you… if you really thought this was solid, listen to it again. I am willing to stipulate that it possibly sounded better in the theater, but over the air… this was not good. It sounded like she had a sore throat, or she had a mouth full of something. Strange. Pitch problems… screwed up some of the words… just not good. Oh… and then the judges pimped the heck out of her, of course. Very annoying.

The comment Simon made about the girls was right. Allison is their only hope. But, based on her going first, along with what I thought was a very “blah” performance… I wouldn’t be surprised to see her in the bottom three (of course, I haven’t seen the others yet).

Anoop: pretty good. Had one phrase that was off pitch. Liked his mild rearranging of the song, and the bead of sweat on his upper lip. He was working it. Does Anoop remind you of an Indian Ray Romano? He totally does that for me. Simon was killing himself that he couldn’t trash the ‘noop-dogg.

Lambert: Tarantino wanted to make out with Adam, that much was clear. Adam’s outfit and his little jog was totally weird. He’s a real talent, though. Paula needs to sit down. Okay, the whole “never gonna die” was totally channeling Axl Rose. Why oh WHY will he not perform some of the classic late 80s/early 90s hair band stuff? He was ripped from this genre and planted here, 20 years later. [side note: Do you think he’s gay…and if that “comes out,” will it have an effect on his fan base of screaming ladies? Just a little discussion fodder]

Matt: Needs to wear a hat… I like him, but the head mole is a little bit distracting. Dude can seriously play piano, though. Wish he would have done without the background singers and the classical guitar. The middle portion of the song was a total mess. Again… Simon can hardly contain himself.

Commercial: I can’t wait to see “Glee,” and I suspect NPH feels this same way.

Danny: “Endless Love” is an interesting choice… with the harp even. Sure, this song is from Endless Love, but isn’t it from “Happy Gilmore,” too? Ice skating scene. He’s good. I had thought that his vocal style would have worn thin by now; but, in my mind, he’s still going strong. Sounds a lot like Eliot Yamin, and I can't decide if that's good or bad. Like Eliot, he’s a very good singer… but there really isn't (as Simon says) much exciting about Danny. But, I wouldn’t mind seeing what he could do as a church music director… that’s for sure.

Kris: (Simon not letting Randy back to his seat…I can’t stand when the judges just jerk around) LOVE the “Falling Slowly” choice! Love this song… love it. He’s putting a lot of confidence in the background singer… wow. This might be the best performance/song choice of the year. I’m serious. Not just his. THE best performance. This was incredible… smart… and done REALLY well.
OH MY GOSH – Randy, you are an IDIOT. I can’t believe he is hating on this… and I’m now hating the fact that we don’t get to hear from Simon so he could set everyone straight… and that they are cutting off critiques so soon. Kara sort of redeemed this, but focusing on Kris’ “obscure” choice of song (you know… he just picked an ACADEMY AWARD winning song on MOVIE night!) sort of overshadowed her point about this performance being excellent. This was a very unjust critique from Randy and I’m really hoping it doesn’t cost him. I haven’t exactly loved on Kris this season, but this was top notch. I think I’m actually going to rewind and watch again.

Lil: can’t say I love Tarantino for saying he’s a fan of Lil. Let’s be honest – she’s not as good as some similar artists Idol has had (Jennifer Hudson, Tamyra Gray, Melinda Doolittle, Mandisa) and would already be gone had any of those Idol contestants (all losers, eventually) been in this year’s competition. She’ll be bottom three for sure. I’m sure she could have a solid career as a backup singer. Paula is just showing off that she knows the author of the song. they are rushing the critiques again, and it’s annoying. As we’ve said… the talking back is never a good idea.

Recaps: Seriously, Allison was off pitch. Listen. Anoop was solid… Adam was creepy and weird, but good… Giraud was decent but bottom 3…. Danny was solid, if boring… Kris was awesome (but may go unappreciated)… Lil was blah (bottom 3).

Predict: Bottom 3 will be between Allison, Anoop, Giraud, and Lil. Hoping it’s Lil… but we might see Anoop or Matt exit.
Oh well.

From NPH: On this we agree: Kris Allen stole the show. Nothing else--not Lambert, not the two-by-two judging, not the tears of the Gokey--nothing else matters. He alone took a layered and nuanced song that required careful control and full-voiced expression and carried it. I actually got some chills, which probably have more to do with the immediate emotional associaton you make with the film (if you've seen it) when you hear that song; the characters and the narrative are deeply embedded in the chords and lyrics of those songs, and you recall all of their complexity and yearning after only a few notes. He channeled all that masterfully, and I applaud him.

This is exactly what Kris Allen needed to do: stand up there like a big boy and invite an audience into a moving rendition of a good song. No guitar, no grimaces and grins and vocal gimmicks. Just plant your feet and sing, son. Well done.

The idea of Kris sticking around for another week doesn't turn my stomach tonight.

I said that nothing else mattered, but I'll respond to your most ereudite commentary. Iraheta was bad. That much is undeniable. Why Paula and Simon raved about her I don't understand, although I don't suspect a Lambert-style conspiracy. The problem was that "I Don't Want To Miss A Thing" totally handcuffed her and prevented her from playing to her strength in the field, which is her rough-around-the-edges style. It was far too staid.

Anoop has figured out that all he can do well are romantic ballads, and so that's what he's sticking with. Randy and Kara said as much. That said, he does it well.

Gokey is Gokey. I'm not a Gokey fan, largely because he sounds to me like Taylor Hicks. "Endless Love?" Really? With a harp? Really? Could his appeal to the over-40 female demographic be any more overt?

Let's see . . . who else? Giraud was solid, but you get the feeling that you've seen the best of what he can do. There's no more there there anymore. Same thing with Lil, although to a much greater degree. She seems to have completely lost herself amidst all the judge-speak about "artistry" and arrangements. She doesn't even sing well anymore, let alone choose strong songs.

Now for the line of the night: "You dare to dance in the path of greatness." Paula actually said that to Lambert. Yes, but has he ever danced with the Devil in the pale moonlight? Abdul actual stood and "Whooped" for him. It's embarrasing. He's crazy good; there's no mistaking that. But he's good at something that is not that appealing to a mass pop music audience, right? His heavy metal scream is something to behold, but I can't take it week after week. I can't imagine it as part of "This is The Time of My Life" or "This Is My Now" or "For A Moment Like This." In other words, I can't hear Lambert singing the Idol victory song, because they, like the competition itself, is about pop music, and he is, at best, a tourist in a genre too small for him.

And to your question, I thought these pictures outed him already. Bill O'Reilly took up the question as to whether or not it will have an effect. Enjoy.

From NPH: I read about the results before I watched, but I watched anyway. Briefly (because there is so much in the world that is more important than this), it's a neat moment. Giraud is saved, the other six contestants mob him on stage, Cowell gets caught on camera smiling, and Kalamazoo's favorite son sheds tears of joy. It's nice.

But it is so painfully obvious that this is what the producers of Idol are after that the moment is very difficult to take seriously. It could have been Matt or Anoop or anyone else; somebody needed to be saved to justify this "judge's save" innovation so that Seacrest could proclaim "Idol history has been made!" For the sake, it seems, of making Idol history. And what is history to an eight year-old pop singing competition?

I've complained about it before, so I won't prolong it here. Just one thing more: can't the judges wait until after the ousted contestant is finished "singing for his life" before they deliberate with one another? Their decision obviously has nothing to do with said life-or-death performance, since they're not even watching it.

The only way this move has any significance is if Giraud survives next week as well. Being that it's disco week, that could well happen. Break out your Barry Gibb, Matty, and work it!

The Reason...

2009-04-14T15:09:00.001-07:00

From the Roller:

Friends, this is why we watch shows like American Idol.
Watch it. Love it. Understand.
peace

Album of the Year Nominee: "Fantasies" by Metric

2009-04-14T12:33:00.000-07:00

Shortly after moving to California in the summer of 2007, I subscribed to the Today's Top Tune podcast at KCRW.com and was promptly served a warm helping from Metric's long-delayed release of "Grow Up and Blow Away," their inaugural studio album from 2001. Two and a half years later, I'll take that record over most others any any given day. If I was stranded on an island . . . you get the idea: it's stupid good.

I've never gotten around to picking up their eventual rookie effort, 2003's "Old World Underground, Where Are You Now?" or the subsequent "Live It Out," and the likelyhood of that happening any time soon just got diminished, as the Candadians this week put out "Fantasies," their new new record, and any time I had laying around for extraneous activities has been taken up with playing and replaying it, grinning like an idiot.

I don't do music reviews. I'm simply a man in search of a genre. And I'm pretty sure that if Metric were a genre, I would major in it. I'm only two listens in, but totally, hopelessly, deliriously hooked. Watch the video for the album's first single, "Give Me Sympathy," below. And ponder this:

"Who'd you rather be: The Beatles or the Rolling Stones?"

IdolCritics, Top 8

2009-04-07T21:28:00.000-07:00

*Newest content at the bottom

From The Producer: I want to apologize to the people reading this blog as I've been MIA the last few weeks and I should thank NPH for his post yesterday regarding my movie project CURVE which Simon Hunter is going to direct. If anyone has opinions on who should star in CURVE I'm open to hearing your thoughts, but will absolutely take the credit if it really happens or will make fun of you mercilessly if you post some really bizarre or weird thought on potential cast.

Is there any way to post this blog in braille because Scott Macintyre needs to hear the truth ... YOU ARE TERRIBLE AND CANNOT SING!!!!!!! You're awkward, boring, and not talented. No one will tell this guy the truth because he is blind so I will ... please stop singing, please go home, and perhaps when you move home you find a local bar that will put up with your horrible attempts at karaoke. Furthermore if for some reason you make it through this week because Lil Rounds or Kris Allen are voted off the show instead of you would you please buy a pair of sunglasses for next week so I don't have to endure 4 minutes of you singing while you never blink during your entire performance. It creeps me out.

This weeks bottom three has to be Lil Rounds, Kris Allen, and Scott Macintyre. America please vote off Scott Macintyre because he has very little talent. At least give Lil Rounds one more night to hang herself since she has no original bone in her body. She's a copy cat and a bad one at that ... I know this stings NPH because you love Lil Rounds, but she's not good. Kris Allen has to be in the bottom three since I was texting during his song hoping it would end since it was one note the whole time he was performing.

Holding strong at the top Adam Lambert, Matt Giurad, and Danny Gokey. Lambert is good NPH and that is why he's going to win, but you might be on to something because the judges praise gets more and more over the top every week. They must have pre-booked all the venues for Lambert to perform after he wins the show so FOX is doing it's part to force feed us Lambert. I think it would be funny to watch America vote him off the show two weeks in a row because you know that first week the judges are going to pull him right back.

BTW ... WTF was going on with the freaky guy from FRINGE tonight? That guys is creepy and I think he raped and killed four people in the audience.

NPH - I killed you in the March Madness Bracket so pay your respect to me in front of your blogging/twittering/tweeting/and whatever else the hell you do all day when you're not helping kids or making Kool-Aid ... Phillips got hammered by his wife in the Bracket which isn't surprising since he's completely lost all ability to be a man. Oh and last ... does "Roller" write science text books for a living because that guys writing is BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

From NPH: Wow, Producer, the gloves are coming off. MacIntyre, Rounds, Roller: you're more merciless than Simon Cowell to these people. Beware, though: at least one of them gets a crack back at you on the blog.

I don't have much to add about tonight's performances. I'm really disappointed in most of it. There's a level of interest that's just not there, and I think that has as much to do with Fox and 19 Entertainment as it does with the contestants and their numbers. The ratings started to slip last year, so this year has a fourth judge and a new "save" option; the contestants aren't equally divided by gender. Whatever, it all reeks of over-effort. MSN had a solid article last week about the lies perpetuated by Idol, chief among them being the line that was repeated again tonight: "this is a singing competition." It's not. It's a television show. There are rules for singing competitions and rules for television shows, and they're not the same. Be that as it may, Idol used to be a pretty compelling television show. These last few weeks, though, I can't find much to get upset or excited about.

In the upset column, the absurd deference paid to Adam Lambert. I called this out four weeks ago, and it never really abated, but tonight it surged spectacularly. Cowell, looking like he was being poked in the back by a stick, ceremoniously gave Mr. Dress-Up's rendition of "Mad World" a standing ovation. It was good, but c'mon. That's just uncalled for. I smelled a rat before. Now I smell a possum.

If it were up to me, Gokey, Desai, Rounds, Allen, MacIntyre, and--yes--Giraud would all be sent packing, like, yesterday. They're all such a boring mish-mash of sameness. Giraud is the best of that bunch, but even he's a dressed-up hamster running in a wheel of blah. It's all so very boring.

Lambert is the truest performer left, and, like we've both pointed out, he seems to have his ticket for the finale already paid for. But the emerging gem for me is Iraheta. Kara (who's contributions to the show were wildly overestimated by yours truly) said tonight of Iraheta's ability, "Let's go make a record." Seriously. Her voice is powerful and genuine and unique. She doesn't throw away notes. She stands there and sings, and she's crazy good.

Pop music and pop culture are fun. Idol, at its best, is a guilty indulgence in that fun. This season is careening off course to an overly-serious bad ending. Give me Iraheta and Lambert. The rest of them just aren't any fun.

From the Roller:
Okay... thought I'd try to get a word in before the results show. Prediction, as referenced last week, is that Lil is in the bottom three. The only reason I think she won't be gone is that the brutality (accuracy) of the judges probably pushed some sympathy voting her way. I don't think, either, that racial issues won't be in play at some point this season. She is the only remaining African-American, and I don't know if there has ever been this early of an exit for the last contestant from that racial-ethic group. That could be interesting if she ends up going... OR if she ends up staying past her real shelf-life... which can't be more than a few episodes. She was bad last night... and it was probably one of the only times I've ever really understood what the judges always harp on about a 'karaoke' performance.

Producer - you are without feeling or tact, though not wholly devoid of insight. That works for you... fine. Truly, enjoy life as an ass.

As for Scott, it's time to go. There's a mediocre record selling 120,000 copies that is begging you to make it. Get to work on it.

Matt - better with the hat.

Lambert - good performance, but let's not lose that his 'brilliance' (Rocky) is heavily reliant on finding a song from 1982 that was remade into a #1 in the UK as recently as 2004 (Donnie Darko soundtrack), and appeared on the worldwide commercial for "Gears of War," one of the best-selling video games in recent years. He made a remake his "own." Way to go, David Cook... I mean, Chris Daughtry... I mean, Adam Lambert. Good company... good strategy... but, at this point, it's not genius. Reminds me that a few years ago, the runner-up Blake Lewis was actually remaking songs himself, which deserves some retroactive praise... and a frowny face that he has been a commercial failure. :( Oh well. Oh... and while I'm on Lambert, WHY in the heck does he get to go last in the 'money spot' so dang often. Totally unfair. To go right before voting opens has proven (historically) to be such a huge advantage. Do they really need to give this guy the Archuleta-esque favorable placements?

I wish the judges (especially Paula... she is a waste) would shut up enough so that the folks (like Matt last night) who did well toward the end of the show would get their due.

As for the rest. meh. nothing really of note, honestly. My wife has decided she "really likes" Iraheta... I can't say I'm sold yet. She a bit too affected for me in her style, but she is 16, and that's how musicians have been doing it in her lifetime.

I want some Sebastian Bach-Skid Row from Adam. On this, I demand satisfaction.
peace.

From NPH: Roller, stay off David Cook. Stay. Off. David. Cook.

Seriously.

The judges' demand for artistry with this bunch is a tactical mistake that's hurting the show. They're using the term as a sort of lipstick they want contestants to apply to pig-faced pop music. The better performances are coming, though, from contestants who tee up great songs as they were intended to be sung. Iraheta's "I Can't Make You Love Me" was tasty because it was simple. Kris Allen's "All She Wants To Do Is Dance" was goofy because that's a guitar song forced to do jazz band work. Why can't a good song done well be enough?

What Lambert is doing is not artistic; about that you are right. Like previous white male contestants who will go unnamed, he is making use of new versions of old songs to great effect. That works because a professional musician arranged it for a specific type of singer. And, to be fair, the Donnie Darko version of "Mad World" that Lambert reprised is no great vocal departure from the original, even if its instrumentation is gutted and tempo slowed. And he did that version the way that version is supposed to be done. And he crushed it.

I'm officially an Iraheta fan, though, and you're not talking me out of it.

My bottom three prediction tonight: Anoop, Scott, and Lil. Scott's going home, amid many tears and high fives.

From the Roller: David Cook is good... loved his remakes. For that matter, loved Daughtry's use of Live on Johnny Cash week, etc. They are among my all-time favorite contestants... partly because they're smart. But, the point was, it's not "artistry," it's a good strategy (one that's been used before). What they are actually talking about was what Blake Lewis was doing. That worked out well for him... um...

As for "Mad World," the Darko version is cool. And yes, not entirely a departure from the original (unlike Chris Cornell/David Cook's Billy Jean). But, getting rid of the synthesizer and the unmistakable 80s flavor is a good thing for AI contestants. As my wife said, "they should quit using keyboards and backup singers... they always sound cheesy and/or terrible."

Not opposed to Allison at all, just not a "favorite" of mine. yet.

No comment on the potential impact of race on voting, the impact, implications, or fallout? I agree with your prediction, btw.

Adam Lambert must sing "I Remember You" by Skid Row. On this I will not compromise.

From NPH: Keep holding out hope, my friend. It will soon be revealed that Adam Lambert is the love child of Sebastian Bach and Melissa Ethridge. It's poetry.

Just watched the results. My bottom three picks were spot-on, as was my prediction of Scott's ouster, complete with tears and high fives.

I'll comment quickly on the race thing. It's a non-issue. TV is TV, and the people who call in and vote do so because they love their Idol. You'd have to look at the numbers to actually make the case that race is having an effect: what's the race profile of the majority of Idol viewers? What about age? Maybe that's more decisive. Or geography? When Kristy Lee Cook sang "God Bless the USA" last year, it was a bald appeal to geography (granted, a racially homogeneous geography), and it worked like magic. Also, race could work in a contestant's favor if they're a minority. After all, all the cheery white contestants are splitting the votes of the cheery white viewers, whereas the African-American, Latin, and Indian contestants have entire demographics to themselves. Sort of how I beat out the two football players for Homecoming King in college: I carried the theater geeks while they split up the jocks. The geeks win again.

I'm ready to declare two things about Idol after tonight. First and most obviously, the show's highest utility is selling Fords, Coke, and iTunes. At its best, Idol makes you forget that. At its present worst, it's all too obvious, like when you have to watch not only another insufferable production of the contestants vamping for a car commercial but also a separate video about how they made the commercial they're about to make you watch. Gah! This is TV, and TV sells things, I know. But do they have to make it so obvious?

Secondly, the Judges Save is a total failure. Not only will it never be used, not only is it a novel gimmick aimed at injecting some drama into the Stax of Wax results shows, but it completely torpedoes what little shred of dignity the show used to possess. Used to be that the Idol who got voted off got to sing one last time as a sort of farewell, teary and embarrasing though it often was. Sometimes though, given that the performance didn't mean anything, it was better than the one that counted, and we all got to feel good about the accomplishment of an undiscovered talent.

Now the post-boot performance is supposed to mean something. Which means that as Scott MacIntyre sings what everyone knows is his swan song, the judges are acting like 6th graders, leaning over their desk to whisper to one another. And then they can't even get their act together enough to give a guy a decent send off. MacIntyre was nearly begging for his Idol life tonight while Simon, Kara, Paula, and Randy stared at each other and the audience heckled them. It's bad, bad television. It reduces a feel-good relationship into an akward let's-still-be-friends-but-occasionally-make-out talk. I am not a fan. It's shameful.

The Producer (Revisited)

2009-04-06T22:45:00.001-07:00

If he's dragging his blogging feet on IdolCritics, we can forgive the Producer if only for this bit of news from Variety:

Simon Hunter ("The Mutant Chronicles") has signed to direct indie thriller "Curve," produced by Benderspink and Solipsist Films, which is financing.
Producers include Stephen L'Heureux of Solopsist, Chris Bender, JC Spink, Neal Flaherty, Chris Billig and Nathan Miller.

Fo' sho.

IdolCritics, Top 9

2009-04-01T22:37:00.000-07:00

From Roller: Thanks for your input, NPH. Let me be clear: Lambert is good, and he's good TV... you have that right. But, that doesn't mean that I have to think that "Play that Funky Music, White Boy," has any place in the "most downloaded" category, and I also think that the judges saying he made that song contemporary was a little obsequious. That song is not, and really, can't be, contemporary. Lambert might need to be careful - he can look sort of creepy sometimes (see Steven Tyler and Mick Jagger reference), and I don't know if that helps him with the younger set.

I watched the results show last night. Some thoughts:

I loved Megan getting in the face of the judges. She said in an interview that she did that 'cause she was sick of the judges talking out loud to one another during the contestants' performances. Good for her.

Kara's response to Ryan when questioned about the heckler (who was Megan's brother, apparently) who called her a broken record was weak. Kara is getting more annoying all the time, though she has yet to break into Paula's realm of irrationality and incomprehensibility.

The lip-syncing at the front of the show in the "Don't Stop Believing" number was terrible. Especially Allison. She looked like she was chewing cud or something. Danny was the only one who was somewhat believable, and that is because he had enough good sense to obscure part of his mouth with the microphone. It didn't even look like Scott was actually playing the song, as his hand movements didn't match the music. That keyboard was not plugged in.

In the Ford video, the rapping from Kris Allen was actually pretty good.

We referred to Matt, in our house, as looking like a "much uglier Justin Timberlake."

I was surprised that 'Lil wasn't bottom three... and I think she's going to have a tough time sticking for too much longer, honestly. Her age/appeal to a younger audience is showing. If they hadn't pimped her so hard during the prelims/auditions, I doubt she'd still be here (as opposed to Megan Joy and Kris, who were ONLY shown at auditions before the round of 32).

Okay... I'll leave it to you.

Rolling...

From NPH: Roller, welcome aboard. I'm totally with you: criticizing song choice is such a standard part of the judges repartee that it means absolutely nothing. It's the one concrete thing they can critique about a contestant (aside from their outfit), because everything else boils down to, "you worked it out" or "I wasn't feelin' you." And we now know just how little "choice" may be involved on Idols' parts.

I'll grant your assessment of most of the performances, but what is foolishness to you about Lambert's number is brilliance to me (note: not "artistry" but sheer entertainment brilliance). People are drawn to Adam Lambert either as a bee to honey or a moth to fire. But they're drawn to him all the same, and that's why he's got the best shot of winning. He's got an undeniable set of skills, better suited for an 80's hair band than anything he'll get to do on Idol, you're right, but whether you're revolted by his performances or delighted by them, you're interested in him. He's water cooler fodder. And, after all, this is television; you don't have to impress people so much as you have to give them something to watch.

From The Roller: Well, I am finally making my long-awaited debut. I feel as though I'm being forced into this unprepared, however, as I haven't even watched the results show yet! I know, it's been a bit of a crazy few weeks.

I gather that Megan, Anoop, and Allison were the bottom three. Can't say that I can argue with that.

One thing that's ticking me off this year... the judges suggesting songs/artists to contestants after they have already performed. It's lame. We don't know how the song selection process works, only that it's not something where "any" song is available (Danny's comment about Motown week and having to sing his 5th choice)... so get off song selection. Just give us a legitimate critique of the performance we heard! It's been a bit silly this year.

My personal rundown on the performances:

Scott will find himself there soon enough though. His Billy Joel was good... but the judges heaped the praise on pretty heavy. Though, the "birth year" thing could work out well for him next week. He has a feel for older songs, and is in no way a contemporary artist. Though, I suppose he's contemporary in the same way Barry Manilow is contemporary... meaning, he could release an album, but he's not going to break any new ground.

Anoop: looked okay, except for the snarly face... that was creepy. Other than that, I can't for the life of me remember what it was that he sang, so that pretty much says it all.

Danny: The Rascal Flatts was a nice choice - big crossover appeal to this band, and the emotional touches on the song that sort of remind one of his touching backstory are going to help him in the votes department.

Lil: I thought this was weak... really weak. I don't know if it sounded better in studio, but I was waiting for the judges to stick it to her, and they softballed the critique. Not impressed with their work there. I, honestly, thought she'd be bottom 3, if not a surprise exit. She is a threat, if only because she's had two pretty shaky weeks and has not found herself in the bottom three yet. Divas usually get voted off in the 3-4-5 spots, right?

Allison: Wow. She was WAY better than the judges gave her credit for... if a little shouty. I think you're right. If she were gone, they'd have saved her. All the focus on her crazy outfit overshadowed what should have been a "hey, nice rendition of an iconic song."

Matt: the more camera time this guy gets, the more I begin to think that my long-ago prediction about him in the finals might be a bit overstated. The Fray is not that different from OneRepublic... get off that train Randy. Interestingly enough though, the fray has been popular in Christian circles, and we know that matt has recorded in that genre before. All that said, I will predict that Matt will show up on the ubiquitous WOW Hits Christian compilation cds within 3 years.

Kris: This was a solid, solid performance... though I still don't think he has a chance at winning. But... I didn't think he had a chance of advancing out of his 12, so he might have a fan base that I am just not aware of.

Megan: This was actually pretty good. For 30 seconds. Then... too much Megan. Bye.

Lambert: This number was foolish. I was embarrassed for him. Ridiculous. Are you honestly telling me you liked this? It was painful to me. Sure, he sang well... but "Play that funky music, white boy?" Ugh. How is this a "most downloaded" song? What? I will be super, super upset if he goes this whole stinking season without singing "I Remember You" by Skid Row, or anything of the Sebastian Bach, Warrant, Bad English, even Guns n' Roses flavor. This guy has a voice made for that stuff. Paula's comparison to Mick Jagger and Steven Tyler was interesting. She puts Adam in a class with two iconic rockers... and two dudes who are seen by younger audiences as relics - old dudes whose on-stage sexuality borders on the creepy. And dudes with crazy mouths... though I'm not sure the last part is relevant.

As for the genre stuff... well, I don't agree. Conceptually, yes, looking at genre/artist based weeks can be fun. Yet, how soon we forget "Gloria Estefan" week? Disco week? What the heck. This, I felt, was the worst thing about Idol (at least in the older days): forcing people to sing songs and artists that they NEVER would end up recording. Some of the genre-bending that has occurred since Daughtry has helped this, but I still like when they give a wide berth to the contestants. They could probably get record labels to sponsor a week, and give them a buch to choose from. That might be a nice compromise.

Iraheta and Lambert? Maybe. I wouldn't put it past Lambert or Allison to really screw up one week. But they are certainly among the top contenders.

Anyway... that's it. I'm just Rolling in the BC.

From NPH: We're expecting a new IdolCritic voice this week to accompany The Producer and yours truly. He has the NPH 411, so he can make his appearance any time now.

Any time.

Now.

Gents, a couple of interesting things happened this week that shed some light on the phenomenon that is American Idol. A departing contestant effectively gave the bird to the judges, who promptly returned the favor by declining to even discuss employing the "judge's save." Good on Cowell for that, I say; the judge's save is a gimmick that doesn't really mean anything. I remarked when the bottom three were revealed that if Iraheta were the victim, the judge's might save her. But she wasn't, and there was no way Megan or Anoop were getting that favor. Megan knew that. To her credit, she said she didn't care, and we all believed her.

Also of note in the Top 9: Iraheta cracked on her Idol-ness Kara DioGuardi, saying, "She's not going to sing, is she?" pointing up the new judge's embarrasing habit of re-doing contestants performances for them. Matt Giraud hammered out a Fray mock-up while standing at a keyboard in a leather jacket. How 1985.

I came away from this week's developments with a couple of insights to test on you guys. First, Lambert is so, so far removed from the rest of the field because he makes for better television. Idol is, after all, a television show, and television is a visual medium. Lambert is a good looking guy who knows how to perform. He has a police siren of a voice, of course, which only helps. But, primarily, he's good t.v.

Secondly, Idol is much better when contestants have to work with a genre. The nod to big-4 sponsor Apple pays the bills (songs were chosen from popular iTunes downloads and contestants were filmed in the opening piece wearing iPod earbuds for no apparent reason), but the availability of such a wide catalogue of music makes for a scattered show. Anoop does Usher before Danny does Rascal Flats while Megan does Bob Marley and Kris does Bill Withers. To the t.v. point again: it's bad. It's for more interesting when performers have to work within the constraints of a genre like Motown or country. Next week is the pick-a-song-from-the-year-you-were-born episode, so no help on that front (last year, David Cook threw down his quasi-controversial "Billy Jean" performance during this week; anything can happen).

Here's the bold prediction that came to me this week: Iraheta and Lambert in the finale.

Discuss. And enjoy Sir Idol below, who rocked it in his return to the show tonight.

IdolCritics, Top 10

2009-03-24T12:48:00.000-07:00

From NPH: Matt Giraud is in the bottom three. That's a bit of a shock. Especially given the fact that Megan isn't. Michael, Scott, and Megan were my bottom three prediction, so I got two of the three right, but certainly missed the third. This is what drives me nuts about this show: it's arbitrary. Also, there's no way to tell why these results shows are put together the way they are. Matt and Michael are left to dangle in the wind after Scott is declared safe, and everyone knows that it's a travesty to put those two next to eachother. But . . .

In past seasons, strong contestants have found themselves in the bottom three early and enjoyed a big bounce in subsequent weeks, as their fanbase reacts to the slight. Maybe the producers are engineering something like that for Giraud.

Of course, Giraud is safe, though, and Sarver has been misled to believe that he can "sing for his life" now. It's a sorry spectacle, watching him straining with every note to save himself and knowing full-well that his chances of being saved by the judges are about as good as Paula's chances of cracking the Billboard charts ever again. There's no way they're saving him. Sayonara Sarver. The judges can't get their act together, though, so it's a clumsy execution, completely lacking in grace. Up against the next show that needs to start, Simon is forced (since, after all, a save has to be unanimous) to tell Michael he's going home. Ugly and unnecessarily insulting.

From NPH: Live-blogging the top 10 (a couple hours after the fact):

10:28: Why have they started announcing the judges? That's dumb.

10:29: Paula wants the contestants to "challenge their artistic integrity." What doest that even mean?

10:33: The Barry Gordy/Smokey Robinson vignet in Studio A is pretty cool.

10:37: Giraud is so much better when he's at the keys, and he looks like a schoolboy in that cardigan, but he carried that off really, really well. For a guy who's recorded a couple of "Christian" records, "Let's Get It On" is an interesting choice, to say the least. Good for him.

10:39: For a guy who gets compared to Justin Timberlake, being called "Sexy cool" by Paula only helps.

10:40 Matt gets declared a "frontrunner" by Simon. Bad karma?

10:41: Kris hasn't even taken the stage yet, and I'm already annoyed.

10:43: Kris contorts his face too much while he sings.

10:44: Stop the presses! Kris Allen is boring.

10:45: Kara says Kris did "everything right" on the performance and Paula's proud of him. "Technically speaking," she says . . . but wasn't that really unremarkable. Lame, even?

10:47: When Ryan and Simon spit back and forth at each other, it's bad TV.

10:52: Scott McIntyre is much better than last week, but he's not long for Idol, I'm afraid. His voice just isn't that good.

10:53: Simon is giving it to Scott and getting booed. This is his first real criticism of the show. Simon called it "cheap." "I've heard that a million billion times," he says. Yes, at Stax of Wax.

10:55: Scott, don't respond to judge critique. It only makes you look bad. And don't admit that you changed songs in the middle of the week!!

10:56: Paula reaches under the desk and retrieves crayons and coloring books for Simon, saying "Here you go you six year-old." And if that's not akward enough, Ryan has to explain to Scott what's happening. This is really bad TV.

10:59: Megan Joy's voice is cracking. Not good. And it never works when contestants circumnavigate the judges table while singing. Her voice is easily the weakest of the 10, and it's not possible for her to hide that in her cuteness and phrasing anymore.

11:02: Kara is singing to a contestant again. That's petty. Stop. Paula tells Megan she's beautiful and Simon mutters, "It's not Top Model." Fair enough.

11:03: Megan looks like she's going to cry.

11:05: Anoop is sitting on the front of the stage. And he's singing--eek: this is bad. His falsetto is painful.

11:07: If all Anoop had to sing of "Ooh Baby Baby" were the verses, he'd be fine. The chorus is killing him. Or rather, he's killing the chorus.

11:08: Another plea for "creativity" from the judges. It seems to me that David Cook set the bar really high last season for how contestants arrange songs. No?

11:10: Seacrest just sang. Gulp.

11:11: Sarver tells us he was sick last week and didn't get to go to Detroit with the rest of the contestants. Is it telling that you didn't even notice his absence earlier?

11:13: Smokey Robinson says Sarver needs to not "sweet talk Ain't Too Proud To Beg." Best. Advice. Ever.

11:13: Sarver ignored Smokey's advice.

11:14: Sarver is boring, boring, boring. Better than Scott McIntyre, but not by much.

11:15: Paula apologizes and nearly cries in criticizing Sarver. "This is hard," she says as she tells him that his performance was "Vegas-ish." Buck up, Paula.

11:16: Simon tells Sarver he has "No chance of winning." Amen.

11:17: Sarver, don't talk back at the judges, especially if you're just going to validate their critique.

11:18: DiaGuardi again with the "artistry" plea! The ghost of David Cook strikes again!

11:19: Sarver is "being true to who he is." Smart move. Also smart is the skillfully employed drawl (he's an oil rigger, you know). He's got a few more weeks in him.

11:20: How good is Lil Rounds going to be? Expectations are hiiiiiiiiigh.

11:21: Wow, Lil looks awesome.

11:22: As expected, she's crushing the song. Girl can flat-out sing.

11:23: Write this down: that performance was one of Idol's best ever.

11:25: Randy and Kara didn't like it. Pthhhhhh.

11:26: Simon thinks Lil didn't have a "moment" in the performance because the song didn't allow it. For me, the whole performance--starting with the video footage--was the moment.

11:28: Lil just reminded Paula that the President is Obama.

11:30: Lambert's hair!

11:31: Lambert to Desai: here's how you sing falsetto.

11:32: Lambert is growing on me. That was pretty amazing. And Kara is standing and telling us about it. There's no context for that move. It doesn't mean anything coming from her.

11:32: Again, one of the judges tells Adam he's in "his own league." I buy it more this time.

11:33: Simon calls it the best performance of the night. Oh, and he's "emerged as a star." Pull it back a bit, Cowell.

11:35: Giraud's my boy, but I just voted for Adam Lambert. Really, I texted "vote" to 5708.

11:36: Smokey told Gokey to add the "You're Allrights" and the "You're Outta Sights" to his version of "Here I Come." Good advice. But then the backup singers are doing it. This is me, shaking my head.

11:38: Seriously, though: Gokey's really good, right?

11:39: The show is running late and the producers are rushing the judges through Gokey's critique. Does that help him out or short-change him?

11:41: Iraheta's not big enough for "Papa Was A Rolling Stone."

11:42: The clap track during the chorus isn't doing her any favors.

11:42: Oh, look: Kara is standing up again. "That is from God," she rants. "You can't teach that!"

11:43: Cowell drew a moustache on Paula's face with a crayon and Iraheta thinks it's hysterical. She is only 16.

11:44: Cue the recap.

11:48: post recap, top-to-bottom: Lil, Adam, Matt, Alison, Danny, Anoop, Kris, Michael, Scott, Megan.

From NPH: This week's schedule is a bit wonky, so that the top 10 don't perform until Wednesday night. The results are on Thursday.

So, Producer, it's Motown week. Surely this format will favor Danny Gokey, Lil Rounds, and Matt Giraud. Also, given his acapella singing experience, Anoop Desai ought to do well. Based on what she did with "Rockin' Robin," I think Megan Joy will survive but not flourish. The contestants I would worry about would be Michael Sarver, Scott McIntyre, and Allison Iraheta. Kris Allen and Adam Lambert? Eough love has already been lavished upon them to get them at least through this week.

Album of the Year Nominee: Anna Egge, "Road to My Love"

2009-03-23T14:09:00.000-07:00

Never heard of her before January, when I read this Rolling Stone review of her latest record. I grabbed it off of LaLa for $.80, and have been listening to it a couple times a week for nearly three months now. It's strong. Egge is a little bit Shawn Colvi n, a little bit David Wilcox, a little bit Pattie Griffin. This record's really good.

Road To My Love - Ana Egge

IdolCritics, Top 11

2009-03-17T13:25:00.000-07:00

From NPH: If the judges are actually going to use the "save" option, it's going to be on Lambert. I just don't think they love anyone else as much.

I don't know what to say about Lil Rounds' attire. Only that you're noticing things that I'm not. As for her chances to win, they took a hit this week, no doubt. I've watched the performance twice now; it was bad. And it's not just because she's an R&B singer doing country. That can be done well (see the video of Fantasia singing "Always on My Mind" from season three).

Worse for Lil, she got into a spat with Simon, which, regardless of what a contestant thinks, never helps their case. I know that the live audience gets a kick out of it when someone like Lil or Michael Sarver pops off with some snarky retort, but the live audience isn't voting; the television audience is. And it never makes them look good. It always shows them up as whiny. And, of course, the criticism they're fending off is always spot-on, which the TV audience can clearly see.

I called Alexis in the bottom three (the only one I got right!), but not to get the boot. What I thought would save her for another week was her initial popularity in Vegas, which gave her the best odds of winning among the final 36. Also, she was named in that New York Post story last week, the one about the Idol staffer claiming she knew the final four (I guess that story's old news, eh?). She sealed her own fate, though, literally begging viewers not to vote her off and promising to "dirty it up" if she survived. She's going to look back on that as a low point in her career, I'm afraid.

From The Producer: I apologize for my tardy response NPH, but it's been a pretty crazy week. I was too busy to write yesterday because I had to wait in line with Bearded Man all day yesterday so we could get matching Danny Gokey Storm Trooper outfits as it's now the craze since Danny Gokey tried to do some product placement for George Lucas on American Idol.

I have to be honest NPH I'm quite surprised you like Matt Giraud who is hands down the best talent on the show. Looking over your blog and now this post it became very apparent you love horrible music especially with telling the world you liked Adam Lambert's rendition of 'Ring of Fire' this last week so I'm just shocked you would have the conviction to like Matt Giraud because he's so good. Lambert was horrible and he should be careful with how weird he gets as I think he's one week away from middle America voting him off the show.

So NPH I know you've said to me a couple times you think Lil Rounds is a good performer ... do you still think she has what it takes? I mean I think she can wail I just can't get past the fact that every week she has what seems to be a tribute to phallic symbols. On the Top 13 show she wore pants that showed how large her penis is and then this last week when they did the jib shot with her sitting with Ryan she was holding the silver microphone in a way that allowed America to again imagine how larger her penis is ... can someone please tell her to stop with all the Phallic Symbols?

NPH, I think you are right about the hat pick that if two people pick the same song they draw for it ... but what does that say for Alexis ... that Joelyn song was horrible and she deserved to lose as a result of her poor choices. I must admit though at the end of the first night I really thought Michael or Lil Rounds was going home. I was surprised Alexis was sent home until she sang that Joelyn song again on Thursday night ... wow that whole performance sucked.

NPH you have more American Idol Seasons under your belt so I feel as though you're correct that the Producers know how to keep Middle America tuning into the show. I don't really care if they perform praise songs, but I wonder if faith or lack of faith will come into play for the voting public later on in the season. I think there will be a week America finally votes Lambert off the show and The Three Stooges plus Simon will bring him back. Thoughts?

From NPH: It's almost 1:00 in the morning on Thursday, and I've just watched Tuesday night's performances. I'll wait for the results until tomorrow. This thing was solid, though, top-to-bottom. My horse Matt Giraud rocked it and won the accolades of all four judges in the process; dude is the professional of the bunch. He's treating an audience to beautiful music, not competing for votes. I think he's going to have to come away from the piano at some point, though.

Scott MacIntyre also got told to get away from the piano, which led to one of those trademark choreographed spats between Simon and Paula. I think it's true, though, both for Scott and for Matt. To win Idol, you have to be able to stand at a microphone with nothing else and wail. David Cook really got traction last year doing numbers with his Luna Apollo, but he won the thing by laying down songs like "The Music of The Night" completely solo. It's strange to say, but knowing how to handle the microphone is an important skill by itself.

A bit about the storylines of the night, then a shocker I'll throw your way. MacIntyre refuted criticism of his choosing Martina McBride's "Wild Angels" by saying that he's "lost a lot of hat picks." That sent me scurrying to message boards, where I learned that he'd either just revealed that the contestants don't actually pick their own songs or that, when two of them pick the same one, they draw out of a hat to see who gets it. I think the latter is probably more likely.

Secondly, Megan Joy had the flu and was hospitalized during the week. She even missed the run-thru. The judges obviously gave her slack for that (as she hacked her way through their criticism), because she was bad. She is bad. She's cute as a button and fun to watch, but she has the presence of nervous waitress. She's incapable of standing there and singing without swinging her hips and hands around, ala an ill-fated "Harispray" audition.

Now the shocker: Adam Lambert impressed me. Big time. His arrangement of "Ring of Fire" was straight-up weird, and it provided a study in class contrast between him and Lil Rounds, who played "Independence Day" straight to "honor" country music. She "honored" the genre (at her own expense), and he hijacked it. The judges have seemingly come down off their Lambert high, but here's the thing that impressed me with this performance: I hear echoes of Jeff Buckley in this kid's upper register. You just don't find guys who can sing like that. I want to hate him, but I've gained a new respect for his ability.

A few other tidbits: Kara loved on Kris because his version of "To Make You Feel My Love" didn't sound country at all. Duh, it's a Bob Dylan song. Gokey appears overconfident and looks like he's wearing a parka. Anoop's "Always on My Mind" was hailed as one of the best of the night and a comeback performance, but I'm not buying it. He's a one trick pony.

Predicted bottom three: Scott, Megan, and Alexis. Predicted boot: Scott.

From NPH: Producer, here's a nugget in anticipation of tonight's performances. MTV's Gil Kaufman is running a story about all the Christian worship leaders who've found themselves on Idol. Of the remaining 11, six contestants "either have a strong affiliation with the church or are worship leaders in their communities."

This is what got my ire up last year, when the show started showcasing religiously-themed performances from its contestants, even going so far as to coreograph a group rendition of the praise and worship song, "Shout to the Lord."

Here's a money quote from the piece:

"The people at 'American Idol' are not idiots. They realize that there's this huge percentage of America that watches TV as a family, and a lot of families go to church. ... [The viewers] know worship leaders and musicians in church, and why not bring that aspect to the show?

Is this Christian-baiting or a coincidental and authentic expression of the contestants' faith?

IdolCritics, Top 13

2009-03-12T21:35:00.000-07:00

Welcome to a Not Prince Hamlet experiment: a weekly conversation with The Producer about American Idol. I assume it requires no explanation. Oh, and we may add a third voice to the conversation before long. Stay tuned.

(Note: the newest post is first; to start at the beginning, scroll down and read upwards)

From NPH: Here's a first line of disagreement, then: Kara Dioguardi. I'm into what she's doing, and I think Idol producers knew what they were doing in bringing her on. Before, when judging was limited to the Trinity of Randy, Paula, and Simon, criticism went something like this:

Randy: Yo, dawg, is was just aight f'me.
Paula: I love what you're wearing, and you obviously tried real hard.
Simon: It was horrible and your parent should be ashamed.

By adding Dioguardi to the mix, Idol has not altered the input of Jackson, Adbul, or Cowell, but it has put them in stark relief. She is just substantive enough to validate most of Cowell's disguist and to show Abdul up as painfully vapid. In fact, with any luck, the move will turn out to be subtraction by addition; Abdul is redundant, and this should be her farewell tour.

Next week is Grand Ol' Opry week. VFTW has a list of songs the contestants can choose from. Here's my bold prediction for the week: Michael the oil rigger will sing "The Dance" by Garth Brooks. You heard it here first.

From The Producer: First let me thank NPH for asking me to take part in the weekly conversation about American Idol. This is the first season The Producer has actually sat in front of the TV to watch this show because his beautiful and wonderful girlfriend told him this is a show we will TIVO and watch religiously. While my Reality TV viewing has always been limited to Project Runway and recently Top Chef I must say after watching American Idol so far this season ... it's a good show.

I took this photo of NPH outside of Fox Studios as the contestants for American Idol were driving through the gate to the sound

stage ... he's totally not a conspiracy theorist ... I mean look at those eyes!

NPH you can't really think there is a conspiracy going on with the producers of American Idol planting talent and forcing the judges to bow down to Adam can you? You gathered your binoculars after fetching information from a website that was made famous by the great Howard Stern who used his platform to try and keep Sanjaya on American Idol a few seasons back because it was hilarious.

Judges - They suck except for Simon. My remote cannot fast forward over the manipulative, crafty, selfish Kara Dioguardi fast enough. The words that come out of her mouth drip with everything that awful in this world ... she is horrible and I wish America could vote to have her hung from a rope publicly in Time Square. Randy and Paula ... still crazy stupid. If I have to hear Randy say bro, dude, like, dawg, or have to watch Paula's flabby old maid arms and crazy injected face dance for one more show I think I might have to stop watching. The only person worth listening to and who is honest about every performance is Simon. Simon who stated that Adam Lambert was the best contestant they saw for the Top 13 show, but reminded Paula there are 10 weeks left so let's not get too ahead of ourselves. No conspiracy there NPH.

Adam is good, has real talent that captured the audience with his performance of Black and White this week. In my opinion only three contestants this week sang a Michael Jackson song that didn't sound like they should have been hammered drunk singing karaoke with the Bearded Man down at the Brass Monkey in K-Town.

My favorites for this week and this season boil down in this order Matt Giraud, Adam Lambert, and Danny Gokey.

For next season I'd love to see both women judges thrown off the show and replaced with Kelly Ripa. American Idol may be a step down for Kelly, but I would much rather listen to her talk for three hours a week about how great the contestants are on American Idol rather than Kara and Paula.

From NPH: That was fast. From 13 to 11 in one fell swoop. I have no problem with Jorge and Jasmine getting booted, although it can hardly be argued that Anoop was the worst performer of the top 13; who in their right mind would try to cover Beat It?

The thing that got my ire up more than anything as I watched the performances last night (yes, last night: absent a television, I watch online the next day) was the judges' fawning over Adam Lambert. Paula actually said that Idol had never, in all of its previous seven seasons, seen a performer like him. But not only the Queen of Hyperbole, but also Simon, Kara, and Randy: they all heaped slobbery praise upon Adam's rendition of Black or White (watch it below). It was good, sure. Excellent even. But there's something suspiciously disproportionate about their accolades, both in terms of the evening's other performances and in terms of Idol judging protocol as honed over the last seven years. They were all so starstruck that I was embarrassed for them. If Kara had leapt upon the stage and pleaded for an autograph, I wouldn't have been surprised.

I think something's fishy here. Vote for The Worst tagged Lambert as a plant early on, which, by itself, doesn't bother me in the least; plants are a part of finding talent. But they seem to be going out of their way to push this kid who, to my mind, is a bit over-the-top and, well, garish.

Am I being a conspiracy theorist?

I Voted

2009-03-11T07:31:00.001-07:00

Last night the presbytery to which I belong (a presbytery is a regional body of Presbyterian ministers and elders) voted on the controversial amendment to the church's constitution that would remove the requirement of ordained officers to "live lives of obedience to scripture and conformity to the historic confessional standards" of the church, among which are said to be "fidelity within the covenant of marriage between and a man and a woman or chastity in singleness." Last summer, the church's national assembly approved replacement language requiring "obedience to Jesus Christ" who is the head of the church. Nothing about fidelity or chastity.

This is not the first time presbyteries have had this debate and voted on such an amendment. In fact, the current language was only added in 1987, and at least two attempts have been made since then to remove it. Interestingly enough, the standards in question originated in this presbytery.

Long story short, the amendment was defeated, which surprised no one. What was surprising (and very disheartening to those championing the amendment) was the margin. 63% of ballots cast were in opposition to the amendment, and only 37% were in support. That's worse than the last time. As I heard one supporter say on her way out of the meeting, "We didn't gain any ground on this one."

Two trends caught my attention during the debate. First, the vast majority of the bible-quoting being done was being done by those favoring the amendment. Those opposing it made repeated appeal to what "the bible teaches" or what "the bible says," but the pro side repeatedly read excerpts from the biblical texts to make their argument that the standard ought to be changed. In fact, only one opponent of the amendment quoted the Bible, and that was Romans 1.

The second trend that you couldn't help but notice was that most of those speaking against the amendment were from the presbytery's racial/ethnic churches. Appeal was made more than once to "The worldwide church" and its opposition to such a change. The racial difference, once noted, made me very uncomfortable.

I'm not impartial. Yet the arguments in favor of the amendment were theologically grounded and scripturally supported. In the end, I fear the arguments don't matter.

That Takes Me Back

2009-03-07T22:06:00.000-08:00

I heard this story on NPR the other day, one of the Youth Radio pieces they regularly produce. It's about West Belfast, Northern Ireland, ten years after the Good Friday Agreement was signed. Incidently, that's also ten years after I spent nine months there.

My gosh, the story captures the sound of that place in a way that makes me long for it. I haven't done that for awhile.

Album of the Year Nominee: M. Ward's "Hold Time"

2009-03-07T19:34:00.000-08:00

He's toured with Conor Oberst and Bright Eyes, and last year he made a record with actress Zooey Deschanel, but M. Ward has made his name making solo records. "Hold Time" is the first I've ever owned. It's solid. Ward is a soulful writer. These songs are good, largely because they're so fun. In particular, "Fisher of Men" keeps popping up in my playlists, often two and three times in a row. It's a Song of the Year nominee for sure.

Hold Time - M. Ward

Culling Contentment

2009-03-05T10:39:00.001-08:00

I'm leading a Lenten group at our church called "Cultivating Contentment." The idea for the group is very open-ended, and I used the first gathering last Sunday to get a sense of where people are experiencing contentment in their lives and where they aren't. I was surprised to hear from many of the 13 participants (lots of them being retired) a sense of discontent not with material possessions and well-being, but rather with things tied to obligation and duty. People were voicing an oppressive sense that they aren't doing enough, that they are not content with their ability to do good.

It could be, of course, that people are as discontent with their material status as I assumed; they're just not admitting it. I'm sure that's true to some extent. But I'm genuinely surprised by this other discontent, and I'm not quite sure what to do with it.

One resource I'm going to use, one that I was using for something completely unrelated to the Lenten group, is Elsewhere U.S.A. by Dalton Conley. The book's main thesis is that Americans today are working more than ever and are less satisfied and secure in their work than ever. We feel like we should be elsewhere all the time; we should be working during leisure time and we should be playing with the kids instead of working. On and on it goes. One of the things that Conley suggests is leading to this discontent with the what and where of right now is something he calls an "economic red shift":

From any link in the chain, it looks like everyone else is rushing away. We may be doing better and pulling away from those below us (perhaps that old college friend who is still struggling to find his calling), while the folks just above us on the income ladder are leaving us in their wake. . . An individual in the top half of income distribution appears, to herself, to be at the eye of an economic storm. This is equally true for those in the top 1 percent as for those just above the median U.S. income. This simultaneous dropping of the floor and raising of the ceiling is enough to induce a panicked, though rational, anxiety response: Work constantly.

Could that be behind my group's sense that they're not doing enough? Could there be a "spiritual red shift" at work, wherein people feel a pull to do more and more (volunteer more, come to church more often, give more) because they perceive that everyone else is doing more than them?

Song of the Year Candidate: "This Tornado Loves You"

2009-03-04T07:44:00.000-08:00

I preemptively nominated Case's new album, Middle Cyclone, for my album of the year. Having listened two it a few times before it was released and now several more times since, I stand by that.

"This Tornado Loves You" is the first track on the record. Case told NPR's Scott Simon that the song came from a dream she had in which a tornado professed to love her. There's music in there.

This Tornado Loves You - Neko ...

Album of the Year Nominee

2009-02-26T21:26:00.000-08:00

Sultry songstress Neko Case comes out with her fifth album on March 3rd. For me, Case is one of those artists whose past work places anything she does into immediate consideration for annual superlatives. So, almost a week before the actual release of the record, I'm officially nominating it for my Album of the Year award.

Listen to the whole album on NPR's website before March 3rd.

Song of the Year Candidate: "I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris"

2009-02-25T09:33:00.000-08:00

One of my new year's resolutions was to invest in good music, rather than just acquiring, at no cost, whatever I could get my hands on. It's a resolution that grew of out envy, envy of those who are able to make best-of-the-year music lists in December. I read those lists and then go get that music. This year, I want to make my own list, and I want the list to be populated with stuff I've actually invested in.

So, to be eligible, an album or song must be released in 2009, and it must be in my library by conscious choice and at some cost. I'll provide regular nominee previews throughout the year.

Here's the first nominee for Song of the Year: Morrisey's "I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris" from his recently released "Years of Refusal." Enjoy.

I'm Throwing My Arms Around Pa...

Wow, Didn't Know That

2009-02-18T23:55:00.001-08:00

Hat tip to Mara Einstein, through whose book, Brands of Faith, I'm currently strolling.

Zondervon, the publisher of that book by that guy who said that prayer at that ceremony last month, is owned by News Corporation, the parent company of the Fox Network and publisher of the Weekly Standard.

Oh, that company's owned by that big guy over there.

Just file that with the other stuff I didn't used to know.

Parsing Steroids

2009-02-18T07:55:00.000-08:00

Not Prince Hamlet is not a physicist or a statistician, but we did play a bit of baseball in high school and college, so I want to say something about how steroids actually work. The prevailing assumption is that a hitter aided by steroids will turn a routine fly ball to left field into a home run to left field and a home run to left field into a towering tape-measure job. That's not how it works.

If steroids chiefly build muscle mass and strength, then the advantage they grant to a hitter is increased bat speed. That doesn't mean that a hitter can hit the ball to the same part of the field, only harder and further. It means that a hitter can hit a ball that he otherwise would miss, or, more to the point, can hit a ball squarely that he otherwise would foul off or fight off his hands. Steroids don't turn routine fly balls into home runs; steroids turn weak ground balls into home runs.

So a hitter on 'roids has the bat speed to get the fat part of the bat around on a 96 mile-per-hour fastball on the inside corner. Other hitters will either be jammed by that pitch, or they will have to lay off it. So steroids expands a hitter's strike zone, allowing him to swing confidently at pitches he normally would take for a called strike.

Mind, he won't get the bat around on that pitch every time. But, whereas without steroids he'll get to it maybe once for every ten times he tries, with steroids that will go up to two or three times. That's statistically significant. It forces pitchers to find other ways to get him out.

This is a layman's analysis only. But the prevailing assumption about how steroids work doesn't go far enough. The drugs provide much more advantage to a hitter than popularly thought.

Waiting on Biden's Breakdown

2009-02-18T07:50:00.000-08:00

Sarah Smith of Wonkette thinks the Veep is headed for a nationally-televised breakdown wherein he will physically assault Barack Obama.

Exaggerate much?

Who Can Argue with Stupidity?

2009-02-17T21:54:00.000-08:00

Alex Rodriguez's admission of performance-enhancing drug use is pure theatric. He's already getting praised for "opening a vein" in his presser on Tuesday, which is precisely what the event was meant to look like: the confessions of a chastened every-man.

Rodriguez hammered the adjectives "young," "stupid," and "naive" tirelessly on Tuesday because those flaws are so much more forgivable than being, say, "dishonest," "dishonorable," and "arrogant." In fact, stupidity and youth are hardly vices, are they? Who among us doesn't look back at their early-to-mid-20's with some mixture of wistful regret and tortured remorse? I was in grad. school at 24; how naive was that?

This is a wordsmithed tap dance staged as a penitent ballet. There's no way a five-year veteran of the Major Leagues is naive, 24 isn't young in the terms of a baseball career, and there's no way an athlete who only months before maneuvered his way into the biggest contract (at the time) in professional sports history can claim stupidity. Dude knew exactly what he was doing. He just can't say so.

Let Me Get This Straight

2009-02-17T21:44:00.000-08:00

Alex Rodriguez injected a substance into his body twice a month in six month cycles for three years thinking that it was an "energy booster."

Note to self: try taking morning coffee intravenously.

Alex Rodriguez describes his three year affair with the substance as the stupid escapades of a "young" and "naive" ballplayer, even though he was 24, 25, and 26 when he took it, had played five full seasons beforehand, and had already played in three All-Star games.

Note to self: you're 32 with an advanced degree and four years into a career. Stop being so stupid.